Toxic People: Decontaminate Difficult People at Work Without Using Weapons or Duct Tape Read Online Free PDF Page A

positive people have tools to manage their ugly behavior. Negative people don’t. Remember that a positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.
    What puts you in the toxic frame of mind? What do you really need to do when you go there mentally? You probably perceive yourself as always getting the middle seat—that place in life where you’ve got a meanie on one side and a real jerk on the other. You know how to solve the problem: Decide not to play their game.
    Start changing your focus today, and you will be amazed how Toxic People lose the game.

Create pleasant memories. Set yourself up for happiness by planning events that you know will have happy endings. Instead of maintaining a pattern of defeat and ugliness, you begin to see things in a more positive light. My belief is that you actually train yourself how to enjoy the present and create your future.
Relish every day. Learn to celebrate small things and combat sameness. Concentrate on staying pleasant, and learn to be grateful. Don’t get caught up in an excess of anything—eating, sleeping, exercising, working, shopping, or anything else.
See friends and make connections. Go out of your way, right now, to send an e-mail or text message to someone you care for and haven’t connected with in a while. Individuals who are connected tend to be more emotionally resilient. Just knowing you have support makes it easier to tolerate life’s little disasters.
Stay out of heavy traffic , because it just makes you realize your lack of control. Like life, sometimes you have to find a new route. This mentally places you in control, and you are in for a more pleasant ride.
Limit your options ; otherwise your mind stimulates debate. There are just too many choices in life. Too many choices equals using your limited time and energy on trivial decisions. Instead of reading every item on the six-page restaurant menu, know what you want before you arrive. When I go out for a routine lunch, for example, I narrow it down by knowing I’ll order some salad that has chicken in it. Then I can focus on my company and any business or socializing.
Enjoy what you do —you own your career. You choose the job. Are you upset about some event at work? Be grateful you have a job, and create an environment of success for yourself.
Don’t follow the herd . Don’t talk, dress, or act like the rest of the people, but stay within your own comfort zone.
Use humor . Lighten up. You take yourself way too seriously. Laugh more.
Learn from your mistakes . Get over them and move on.
Form your own opinions . Think for yourself. Don’t take what you read in the newspaper, see on television, hear on the radio, or Google on the Internet as gospel. And don’t conform to someone else’s thinking just to have them like you.
Play to win . Success, by your own definition, is a critical component for you to have a happy life, build good relationships, and die satisfied with the person you have chosen to be. You are 100 percent in control.
    There are always people judging you, so remember the other side of toxic behavior and how people view you. How do you think you are perceived at work? Do you work well with others? Play by the rules, and you will win the game!

Chapter 3 - The Steamroller
    Take 1: How They Sound
    Late as usual! Jerry huffed into the meeting, dramatically pulled out the large leather chair, and spread his papers over his allotted space at the conference table. After a quick glance at the agenda he had approved, he loudly said, “Morgan, I’ve already told you not to distribute the agenda before I arrive. Do I need to remind you again? Or perhaps I should get you, my assistant, a keeper.”
    Morgan sheepishly explained that the group had requested the agendas so they could begin the meeting to save time. Pounding on the table, Jerry bellowed, “I buy everyone’s time, and I will determine how it is used!” Not