The Day Before Read Online Free PDF Page A

even
start moving.
    “Call me!” Parker yells out.
“I’m here for you, man.”
    Cade waves and then
we’re back in his car
with an orange octopus
that’s as bright
as my ever-growing
curiosity.

20/20
    Hidden, there,
behind the face
of a beautiful boy,
I see you.
    The real you.
    The you who flips a coin,
hoping to understand
how fate works:
this choice or that choice,
ultimately leaving you
no choice at all.
    The you who smiles
and tries to be happy
because that’s what
people want
you to be.
    The you who plays
“it will be okay”
on repeat
all day, every day,
to try and convince
yourself
that it will be.
    I see you.
    Because in you,
I see me.

RSVP
    “Are you going back?” he asks me.
    For a second, I’m not sure what he means.
“Back where? Home?”
    “Yeah. I mean, did you come here
thinking maybe you just wouldn’t go back?”
    I told the limo driver
to pick me up
tomorrow at eight a.m.
“I’m going back. I have to.”
    “I bet others would say screw it,
and just not go back.”
    I shrug. “Yeah. Maybe.”
    And that’s all he says.
    Wait.
Was that an invitation?

look around
    This time,
Agate Beach
is our destination.
    “Come on,” I say,
running down the path
toward the sand,
wanting him
to run after me.
    And in that moment
I close my eyes
and I wish.
    I wish
for the breeze to
blow away
our troubles.
    I wish
for the sun to
dry out
our sorrow.
    I wish
for the friendship
to fill up
our hearts.
    I open my eyes.
Right now I see only good.
I want him to see it too.

release me
    The kite flutters
in the wind,
and as Cade
lets the string out,
it soars
higher
and higher.
    It’s so calming,
watching the kite
fly in the sky.
    And in this calmness
he opens up a little.
    He’s a senior
at Wilson High School
in Portland.
Wanted to live here with his dad,
but his mom wouldn’t let him.
    “It’s crazy, isn’t it?” I say.
“That we don’t get a say.
That it doesn’t matter what we want.”
    The kite dips,
and as it does,
Cade releases some string,
does a few quick maneuvers
to save it from crashing
to the ground.
    It flutters again,
and soon the kite
is dancing with the sun,
back where it belongs.
    “Yeah,” he says. “It should matter.”

holding the line
    “Are you going back?” I ask him.
    Because he asked me.
And maybe
that’s what’s on his mind.
    Maybe he’s here,
and he doesn’t want
to go back there.
    The kite dips again.
    “I don’t know.”
    This time he doesn’t save it.
He lets the kite fall.

please try
    After an hour
the wind dies down,
so the kite-flying
part of our day is over.
    I pull out my phone
and check the clock.
My stomach’s telling me
it’s time to eat something.
    I quickly reply to a text
from Madison,
then I’m back
to wondering
what comes next
with Cade.
    “Heads, sushi,” I say.
“Tails, Chinese.”
    “Well, it better be tails
because I don’t do sushi.”
    “You don’t do sushi?
Christ, kill me now!”
    I pick up a small stick,
pretend to stab it
into my chest
and drop to the sand
on my back.
I lie there with my eyes closed.
    Warm breath on my neck.
Soft shiver down my spine.
Sweet words whispered in my ear.
    “But with you, I might try anything.”

worth a shot
    I turn,
his face right there.
    Warm, brown eyes.
Dimple in his cheek.
Red lips, chapped from the wind.
God, he is adorable.
    I want to kiss him.
But I don’t.
    Because more than that,
I want to know.
No, I need to know.
Is he okay?
    I whisper back,
“Then please tell me what’s going on with you.”

soaking wet
    He’s up and
out of there so fast,
you’d think my words
were a cold, wet
ocean
    wave.
    “Cade, wait!”
    I run after him,
the warm sand
gripping my feet
with each step
as if it were trying to tell me
to go slowly,
carefully.
    He turns.
    “You gave me your word.”
    “I’m sorry.
I’m just …
I’m worried about you.
I want to help you.”
    “You can’t help me!
No one can help.
Don’t you get it?
There’s nothing anyone can do.
Nothing!”
    Then he’s walking away