As Black as Ebony Read Online Free PDF Page A

said. There were things Lumikki had never told anyone. Things like the names of her tormentors.
    Lumikki could barely dial her phone, her hands were shaking so much.
    Thankfully, Sampsa answered immediately.
    “Can I see you today?” Lumikki asked, trying to sound nonchalant.
    “No.”
    Lumikki swallowed.
    “Why not?”
    “I have band practice tonight and I’ve got an important project to finish, namely buying you a Christmas present,” Sampsa said with a laugh. “So you’ll have to wait until tomorrow, beautiful.”
    “Okay.”
    Lumikki would have liked to draw out the conversation and hold on to the safe warmth of Sampsa’s voice, but she didn’t dare say anything that might reveal everything wasn’t alright. So she made small talk, telling him about her parents’ vacation plans and remodeling plan. The sort of chitchat Lumikki never indulged. But Sampsa was in a hurry, so soon Lumikki was sitting with a mute phone in her hand, staring at her reflection in the window.
    In her eyes was the same defiant fear as when she was seven years old.

Every hit and every kick had to strike the opponent in a way that significantly reduced his fighting effectiveness. Halfhearted attacks were pointless. They just consumed energy without helping to vanquish your enemy.
    Lumikki squeezed her fingers into a fist. Left, left, right. Left, left, right. And remember to block. Keep moving.
    How blood starts flowing from a nose when it comes into contact with a fist. How a cheekbone breaks when a sharp kick hits it. The opponent’s legs give way. He falls. He is at your mercy.
    Suddenly, Lumikki couldn’t go on. Her feet wouldn’t budge. The others continued moving to the thumping music of the Combat session, following the trainer’s shouted commands, but Lumikki couldn’t aim another single strike at her imaginary foe. Of course, this was just aerobics, a group exercise class spiced up with a little faux martial arts, but right now the mental images were too much.
    Before her eyes, Lumikki saw Anna-Sofia and Vanessa lying in the snow, beaten to within an inch of their lives. No, that hadn’t really happened, but she still imagined it that way. Was “Shadow” right? Did she still want revenge on those girls?
    Lumikki had thought that coming to Combat would take her mind off the notes, but that hadn’t happened. The music thundered in the gym. The air stank of sweat. A few others started casting irritated glances at Lumikki because she was just standing in the middle of the room, resting her arms on her knees. Get out of the way , their eyes said.
    As soon as her legs felt like they would carry her, Lumikki started weaving her way through the crowd. She didn’t even bother saying sorry when she bumped into a few of the other girls enthusiastically hitting and kicking at the air. After making it to the locker room, Lumikki headed straight for the toilet. She barely got the door latched and the lid up before the vomit gushed out of her mouth. Lumikki held the sides of the bowl, retching pieces of goat cheese lasagna. Her whole body shook. Lumikki didn’t remember when she had last thrown up. It felt just as horrible as ever.
    In the shower, Lumikki was alone. She could still hear the Combat class outside. Coming here had been a bad idea. She would have to find some other way to clear her mind. Lumikki stood under the warm water long after all of the shampoo and soap was rinsed from her hair and skin. The wetness of the water was a caress. It was an embrace she could take momentary refuge in.
    Lumikki tried to pinpoint the department store speakers playing the saccharine song. She hoped that if she could cast them a sufficiently searing glance, the worst Christmas ditty in the history of kitsch would end as the speakers burst into flames. Wham! released “Last Christmas” in 1984. Wasn’t it about time for it to crawl off to the pop song graveyard and die?
    Apparently, department stores thought differently. Maybe somewhere