The Day Before Read Online Free PDF

again.
And I follow.
    Because I know that feeling—
that goddamn,
son-of-a-bitch,
asshole of a feeling—
better than anyone.

Nine months ago
Dear Jeanie and Allen,
Okay, you want to hear from me?
Here you go.
I can’t believe you are doing this to me. I can’t believe you actually think this is what’s best for me—to know you and to share my life with you.
You aren’t my parents! My parents have raised me and loved me for the past fifteen years, the way you raised and loved your daughter, Charlotte.
I’m sorry she died. I’m sorry! But why am I being punished for that? Why is my whole family being punished?
If you care even a little bit about me, you will drop this. You will let it go—let me go, to live the life I want to live.
Please. I’m begging you.
Let me go.
And leave me alone.
Amber

unexpected
    But he doesn’t leave.
    He walks down the beach.
I realize his shoes are by my bag,
so he can’t just leave.
    I want to help him.
    But maybe helping is doing
what we’ve been doing all day.
Hanging out.
Having fun.
Forgetting everything,
except what’s in the moment.
I kick myself.
    I should have kissed him
or asked for the penny
or thought of a movie with sushi in it.
Anything besides asking that question.
Anything.
    I stop and decide
to give him some time
to get over it.
Please let him get over it.
    We’re friends now.
How could I not ask?
I had to ask.
And hopefully he’ll realize that.
    As I head back to
where our stuff is,
I hear my name
floating on the breeze
in the distance.
    I turn and see her
running toward me.
Madison.

three’s a crowd
    After hugs and hellos,
she loops her arm
in mine, and as we walk,
she tells me
about combing each
and every beach in Newport,
until she finally texted me
to get my location.
    Her own treasure hunt.
Although, what kind of treasure am I?
    “You didn’t have to come,” I say.
“I’m fine.”
    “No, cat, you are not fine.
“You came to the beach by yourself!
That is not fine!
That is freaky!”
    “Except, I’m not by myself.
Not anymore.”
    She doesn’t get it.
    I turn and point to Cade.
    Her eyebrows creep up
along with the corners
of her mouth.
“So, what other secrets are you hiding?”
    She pulls me down
on the sand
where we sit side by side,
passing questions and answers
back and forth like we’re on
a TV game show.
    We’re so engrossed,
we don’t notice him
until his shadow falls over us.
    “Cade,” I say,
“this is my best friend, Madison.”
    “Hey, cat,” Madison says.
“Thanks for taking care of my girl.”
    “Cat?” he asks.
“It’s actually Cade.
Rhymes with ‘wade’?”
    I laugh.
“No, see, instead of ‘dawg’?
It’s ‘cat’—her thang.”
    He crosses his arms and
tries to give her a smile.
“Yeah, well, since you’re here,
looks like my job is done.”
    Panic rises up in me
like a seagull taking flight.
    Madison is quick
to come to my rescue.
    “I’m not staying.
Just needed to make sure she’s okay.
And she is, so I’m outta here.”
    “I have something I need to do,” he says.
“Why don’t you go eat?”
He looks at me.
“I’ll meet up with you later.”
    There’s a look in his eye
that tells me I shouldn’t argue.
I want to.
But I don’t. We exchange numbers,
and before he goes, I say,
“Heads, you call me.
Tails, you call me.”
    His eyes are
little pools of sadness.
“I can’t promise.”
    Without thinking,
I reach out and hug him.
I squeeze tighter than he does.
Because I don’t want him to go.
    I kiss his cheek.
“Call me,” I whisper.
    And then I let him go.

sugar and spies
    We get in Madison’s Kia,
and before I can even
get the words out,
she’s reading my mind
like a best friend should.
    “We’re following him, right?” she asks.
    I reach into my bag.
Jelly beans for dinner.
    “Right as raspberry.”

I’m lucky
    When we got the news
about the court’s decision,
Madison was right there,
making me brownies,
trying to cheer me up.
    People always say
chocolate