The Cottage in the Woods Read Online Free PDF Page A

pear-shaped frame, and I couldn’t help but compare her to my own flat figure. I thought I would try to make some friendly overture, but she was gone as quickly as she came—before I could ask her to show me to the kitchen. I did not want to venture out again without some guidance, and so I turned to the mirror on the bureau and gave an experimental knock on the corner. “Hello, Mirror?” I asked. “Is anyone there?” I rubbed its surface with my handkerchief, wondering if it could have grown indolent with disuse. “Hello?” I knocked again.
    My reflection in the mirror turned to roiling dark clouds, but no other face appeared. Only a disembodied voice croaked, “Go away!” and the mirror went black. I rapped harder on the shiny surface, and said forcefully, “Mirror, I’m afraid I must insist. Wake up.”
    “What is the password, then?”
    “Password? There is no password. You’re a mirror. You must answer me.”
    “There
is too
a password, and you obviously don’t know it, so I don’t have to answer you at all.” And the mirror turned black once more.
    “I only wanted directions to the kitchen, for pity’s sake,” I said.
    The mirror clouded up again. “You guessed the password!”
    “I did? What was it?” I asked.
    “To,”
came the answer.
    “
To?
That’s not a very good password, is it? Anyone might say it by accident.”
    “Yes, well, only those who are rude enough to insist on making inquiries at this hour of the morning.”
    “The kitchen, if you please, Mirror.”
    Some incoherent grumbling could be heard as the agitated clouds formed into a carnival mask, all black on one side, all white on the other. He was wearing a long, tasseled nightcap and yawning widely. “You must begin by opening your door. Then you must go down the long corridor to the right, like so.” The mirror presented a picture of the corridor. “And you will come to the back staircase.” The mirror presented a view of the staircase. “Turn left at the bottom of the stairs. From there your snout will lead you to the kitchen.
    “Or else you should go out of your door and go to the left, then take another left after the portrait gallery.” The mirror presented views of the route. “Go down another set of stairs, take a right, go to the end of that hallway, and open the door.”
    “Well, how do I begin? Go right or go left?”
    The face raised one imperious black eyebrow. “I’m sure that’s not for me to say. I’m merely presenting both sides.”
    “Both sides? Will both answers lead me to the kitchen?”
    “No, only one will, but it’s more fair this way.”
    “Fair to whom,” I asked, “if one way is true and the other a lie?”
    “Why, fair to the lie, of course. But there it is, a fair and evenhanded account. Equal time for opposite views. Now it’s up to you. Good day.”

5
A Trip to Paradise

    The savant’s face clouded up again, and then shifted back into my own reflection. Clearly I would get no more information out of him. I went to my door and looked both ways, up and down the corridor. I decided to begin with the first set of directions, going to the right and looking for the back staircase. It did occur to me as I made my way down the corridor that the mirror might have been misleading me on both counts, but having no better choices, I persevered. At the bottom of the stairs, my snout detected the mouthwatering smell of fresh biscuits baking. My senses did indeed lead me directly to the kitchen, where the scene was one of pleasant hubbub.
    The first person I encountered was Fairchild, who introduced me to the head housekeeper, Mrs. Gudge. She was an impressive older bear with an air of quiet authority. “Good morning, miss,” she stated perfunctorily. “I hope you’ve found everything to your satisfaction?” Her tone brooked no objection, so I made no complaint about the mirror. She went onto introduce me to the kitchen staff and various servants who were bustling in and out, and I