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okay with him doing that? It’s what I wanted, but it wasn’t something I could ever live with. “No.” This time he let me pull away from him.
    “Why not?”
    “Because. I told you already. I’m not here to fix you. I’m not here to change you.” I turned on my heel, making for the door.
    “But you have.” I froze. How was I supposed to react to that? I tried to think of something to say, but I couldn’t. My mind refused to work for me. I managed to turn around and stare at him. “For the first time in a long time, I actually want to be around someone. I actually want you to stay the night. I want to see you again. I want to feel you, to get to know you, to talk to you and have you over for dinner and … and … you didn’t want to fix or change me, but the truth is you have changed me. Maybe it’s not something you were trying to do, but you did it.”
    I couldn’t think of anything to say. I felt a tear prick the corner of my eyes again. This time I allowed myself to blink, and the tear fell down my cheek. “I …” I tried to force myself to say what was on my mind. “I don’t think I’ve ever been told something that sweet,” I admitted.
    Priest gave me a weak smile. “Well, it’s true. I … you may be right that I’m about to do something stupid but … but if it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t be determined to maybe … suffer for that stupidity but … keep living.”
    I choked on air. Was he trying to tell me he was going to kill himself? But I’d made him reconsider it …
 
    ***
 
    I’d always just planned on killing myself and being done with it. After all, I’d be sent to jail for a long time after this … maybe even life, but somehow, Sam made that okay. She made me consider a life in jail just so I could see her every now and then. Just so that I could hear her voice and listen to her tell me about her day.
    It sounded so stupid, and I knew that but … it felt right. It felt like the thing I wanted to do, maybe not the thing I should do, but the thing I wanted to do.
    I jumped off the bed. “Sam, please. Please don’t leave me. You can go if you want; if you need to think things over and get a grasp on everything, but please don’t leave me. Promise me you will come back.”
    I could hear the pleading in my voice, and I didn’t care. I wanted her to know how much I didn’t want to lose her. I wanted her to know how much she meant to me.
    My eyes locked onto her as she searched my face for truth. A small smile spread across her lips as she reached out and touched my arm. Her fingers curled around my bicep.
    “I’m not going to leave you. I … I need some time to think about everything. I need time to get my thoughts straight, and I’ve got a lot of questions, but I’m going to come back, and we’re going to talk about this. I want to hear what you have to say for yourself.” She stepped close to me. “But right now … I need to go. I need to give myself time to accept that you’re always going to love her, and even if you do ever love me—you’re still going to love her more.” I opened my mouth to protest, but she put a finger on my lips. “Don’t deny it. We both know it’s the truth.” Another tear slid down her cheek before she could turn away from me.
    I stood there as she walked out of my bedroom. My heart raced. Was I supposed to go after her?
    She wanted time alone.
    Was I supposed to say anything? What was I supposed to say? I felt my lower lip quiver for a fraction of a second and something pricked the corner of my eyes. No. I wasn’t going to cry.
    My heart sank as I heard the front door open and close behind her. I took a shaky breath.
    If I ran, I’d still be able to catch her.
 
    ***
 
    Tears splashed down my face as I walked down his driveway. My mind raced.
    He’s never going to love me as much as he does her. Out of everything going on in my head that was the one thing I couldn’t stop thinking. She was always going to be his true