Vital Signs Read Online Free PDF Page A

always be ruled by the whim of the doctors at the Women’s Clinic or the vagaries of your menstrual cycle. You didn’t tell me until Saturday about this egg retrieval today. I didn’t know you were going to give yourself that releasing injection or whatever you call it.”

“We’ve followed the same schedule as we have on three previous in-vitro fertilization cycles,” said Marissa.

“I didn’t think I had to spell it out for you every time.”

“What can I say? When this meeting was scheduled we weren’t involved with infertility treatments. I haven’t reviewed my entire calendar with your fertilization cycles in mind.”

Marissa suddenly felt angry again. Robert went to the armoire to get a freshly laundered shirt. Above his head Joan Lunden was interviewing a celebrity on the TV screen.

“All you think about is business,” she muttered.

“You have meetings all the time. Can’t you postpone this one for half an hour?”

“That would be difficult,” Robert said.

“The trouble with you is that business is more important than anything else. I think you have a mixed-up set of values.”

“You are entitled to your opinion,” Robert said calmly, trying to avoid another round of mutual recriminations. He pulled on his shirt and started buttoning it. He knew he should remain silent, but Marissa had hit a sore spot.

“There is nothing inherently wrong with business. It puts food on the table and a roof over our heads. Besides, you knew how I felt about business before we were married. I enjoy it and it’s rewarding on many levels.”

“Before we were married you said children were important,” Marissa retorted.

“Now it seems that business comes first.”

Robert stepped over to the mirror and started to put on his tie.

“That was how I felt before we learned that you couldn’t have a child, at least not the normal way.” Robert paused. He realized he’d made a mistake. He turned his head to look at his wife. He could tell by her face that the careless comment had not gone unnoticed. He tried to take it back.

“I mean, before we learned that we couldn’t have a child the normal way.”

But his restatement didn’t mitigate the blow. In a flash, Marissa’s anger dissolved to despair. Tears welled anew and Marissa began to sob.

Robert tried to put his hand on her shoulder, but she pulled away from him and ran into the bathroom. She tried to shut the door behind her, but Robert pushed his way in and enveloped her in a hug, pressing his face into the crook of her neck.

Marissa’s whole body shook as she wept. It took her a full ten minutes to begin to recover. She knew that she wasn’t acting like herself. No doubt the hormones that she’d been taking contributed to her fragile emotional state. But that knowledge didn’t help her pull herself together any faster.

Robert released her long enough to get her a tissue. Choking back new tears, she blew her nose. Now she felt embarrassed on top of her anger and her grief. In a shaky voice she admitted to Robert that she knew she was to blame for their infertility.

“I don’t care if we don’t have children,” Robert said, hoping to soothe her.

“It’s not the end of the world.”

Marissa eyed him warily.

“I don’t believe you,” she said.

“You’ve always wanted children. You told me so. And since I know all this is my fault, why don’t you be honest about your feelings. I could deal with honesty better than your lying to me.

Tell me that you’re angry.”

“I’m disappointed but I’m not angry,” Robert said. He looked at Marissa. Marissa stared back at him.

“Well, maybe there have been a few moments,” he confessed.

“Look what I’ve done to your clean shirt,” Marissa said.

Robert glanced down at his chest. There were patches of dampness from Marissa’s tears both on his shirt and on his half-tied tie. Robert took a deep breath.

“It doesn’t matter. I’ll put on another.” He quickly pulled off