The Complete Tommy & Tuppence Collection Read Online Free PDF Page A

Nothing.”
    Tuppence nodded gloomily.
    â€œWhat about the colonies?” she suggested.
    Tommy shook his head.
    â€œI shouldn’t like the colonies—and I’m perfectly certain they wouldn’t like me!”
    â€œRich relations?”
    Again Tommy shook his head.
    â€œOh, Tommy, not even a great-aunt?”
    â€œI’ve got an old uncle who’s more or less rolling, but he’s no good.”
    â€œWhy not?”
    â€œWanted to adopt me once. I refused.”
    â€œI think I remember hearing about it,” said Tuppence slowly. “You refused because of your mother—”
    Tommy flushed.
    â€œYes, it would have been a bit rough on the mater. As you know, I was all she had. Old boy hated her—wanted to get me away from her. Just a bit of spite.”
    â€œYour mother’s dead, isn’t she?” said Tuppence gently.
    Tommy nodded.
    Tuppence’s large grey eyes looked misty.
    â€œYou’re a good sort, Tommy. I always knew it.”
    â€œRot!” said Tommy hastily. “Well, that’s my position. I’m just about desperate.”
    â€œSo am I! I’ve hung out as long as I could. I’ve touted round. I’ve answered advertisements. I’ve tried every mortal blessed thing. I’ve screwed and saved and pinched! But it’s no good. I shall have to go home!”
    â€œDon’t you want to?”
    â€œOf course I don’t want to! What’s the good of being sentimental? Father’s a dear—I’m awfully fond of him—but you’ve no idea how I worry him! He has that delightful early Victorian view that short skirts and smoking are immoral. You can imagine what a thorn in the flesh I am to him! He just heaved a sigh of relief when the war took me off. You see, there are seven of us at home. It’s awful! All housework and mothers’ meetings! I have always been the changeling. I don’t want to go back, but—oh, Tommy, what else is there to do?”
    Tommy shook his head sadly. There was a silence, and then Tuppence burst out:
    â€œMoney, money, money! I think about money morning, noon and night! I daresay it’s mercenary of me, but there it is!”
    â€œSame here,” agreed Tommy with feeling.
    â€œI’ve thought over every imaginable way of getting it too,” continued Tuppence. “There are only three! To be left it, to marry it, or to make it. First is ruled out. I haven’t got any rich elderly relatives. Any relatives I have are in homes for decayed gentlewomen! I always help old ladies over crossings, and pick up parcels for old gentlemen, in case they should turn out to be eccentric millionaires. But not one of them has ever asked me my name—and quite a lot never said ‘Thank you.’ ”
    There was a pause.
    â€œOf course,” resumed Tuppence, “marriage is my best chance. I made up my mind to marry money when I was quite young. Any thinking girl would! I’m not sentimental, you know.” She paused. “Come now, you can’t say I’m sentimental,” she added sharply.
    â€œCertainly not,” agreed Tommy hastily. “No one would ever think of sentiment in connexion with you.”
    â€œThat’s not very polite,” replied Tuppence. “But I daresay you mean it all right. Well, there it is! I’m ready and willing—but I never meet any rich men! All the boys I know are about as hard up as I am.”
    â€œWhat about the general?” inquired Tommy.
    â€œI fancy he keeps a bicycle shop in time of peace,” explained Tuppence. “No, there it is! Now you could marry a rich girl.”
    â€œI’m like you. I don’t know any.”
    â€œThat doesn’t matter. You can always get to know one. Now, if I see a man in a fur coat come out of the Ritz I can’t rush up to him and say: ‘Look here, you’re rich. I’d like to know you.’ ”
    â€œDo you