just need to know beforehand so that we’re prepared.”
“Listen to me closely,” Starr instructed, her tone harder than Gunny’s. Daegan ignored the fact that his hand contained a slight tremor and poured himself a cup of coffee, ensuring it was only three quarters the way full. It wasn’t that he didn’t understand the need to avenge Sidney Taylor’s death. It was the fact that he knew from personal experience that it wouldn’t bring the woman back to life. He took a drink of the coffee out of a Styrofoam cup, not caring that it burned his esophagus on the way down. It was better than feeling what this conversation had dredged up. “We do our mission and we leave. I gave my word to Gunny that I would see this operation through to its logical conclusion, but understand me clearly—we are not here to seek vengeance.”
“Yes, ma’am.” Those words were muttered around the room, although Daegan had caught Gunny’s stare. Neither man said a word. Daegan didn’t like the knowing look in Gunny’s eyes, so he was relieved when Trigger finally managed to insinuate Diesel’s role into the mission. The change of subject had Daegan breathing evenly again and he somewhat relaxed his stance. “Diesel would easily be able to lead us in the right direction once we get into the general area, but it will be dicey if Mykelti has gone to the east as we believe and broken up the hostages into smaller groups.”
“I agree.”
Daegan half listened to the conversation as he went about making another pot of coffee. It seemed as if they would be here for a while before Starr left to debrief the captain, and he for one wanted more caffeine. What he really needed was some fresh air, but that wasn’t going to happen anytime soon. He clenched his jaw when Gunny silently closed the distance and poured the remaining contents of the carafe into a cup before sliding it back into place for Daegan to finish his task.
“Whatever you’re going to say, I’d rethink it,” Daegan warned, not bothering to take his eyes off of the coffeemaker. “You’re the team leader of this crew and I respect that. That doesn’t make us best buddies who share our past…mistakes.”
Daegan had no doubt that Starr had each of them independently investigated before she had offered them a position on her team nor did he have any misgivings that Gunny had read through the files. If either of them had any reservations about anyone in this room they would never have been given this opportunity. Daegan would do his job and do it to the best of his ability without repentance. He’d been there and done that and knew it didn’t bring back the dead.
“I understand why you and the team would think I’d want retribution on Mykelti, but I would never ask this team to do something that would put them at risk for personal motivations,” Gunny replied, not letting this die. “Saving those girls from a fate worse than death is our assignment and one that Sidney would want me to carry out. It doesn’t go beyond that.”
“You keep telling yourself that, Gunny.” Daegan didn’t know why he was offering advice when it was clear that he still had issues with his own past decisions, but if Gunny could benefit from his knowledge then so much the better. The team continued to talk about the mission in the background, so he looked Gunny’s way to make sure he had his full attention. “I don’t say this to be cruel, but do you hear Sidney’s voice crying out for help when you go to sleep at night? Do you see her lying in a pool of blood when you close your eyes, knowing there wasn’t a damn thing you could do to stop it?”
Gunny was the biggest man in this room, but it didn’t matter when he was up against the monster of powerlessness. Men like them weren’t cut out to be vulnerable. They didn’t know how to handle it and they usually resorted to their basic animalistic instincts. Daegan could see his words hit home, but that was his