Shatnerquake Read Online Free PDF Page A

Hooker, “but, I am taking you down.”
               
    Shatner turned and ran into the next room with Hooker hot on his tail.   Directly in front of Shatner was the ambulance that he was carried off in from “The Twilight Zone. ”   He went to dodge around it but Hooker tackled his legs from behind.   Shatner fell forward and his head THUNCKED off the vehicle.
               
    The world faded in and out from color to black.   Through the haze Shatner could see Hooker standing over him.   Hooker pulled out his police baton and raised it over his head.   Shatner’s senses shot back and he kicked out his leg, hitting Hooker squarely in the balls.    He grabbed his crotch and keeled over.  
     
    The crowd laughed and applauded.  
               
    Shatner got to his feet.   Next to the ambulance there was a small glass display containing the vehicle’s key.   Shatner covered his hand with his jacket sleeve and punched through the case.   He grabbed out the key and held it in his fist; it jutted out from between his index and middle fingers.  
               
    He turned and Hooker was already charging, baton held high.   Shatner stepped forward and slashed with the key.   Black goop splattered on the ambulance and Hooker held his face screaming.  
               
    Shatner ran past him to the ambulance, pulled open the driver’s side door, and got in.   He used the key and turned it on.   It roared to life, its engine growling and sounding more like a hotrod than an emergency vehicle from the nineteen fifties.  
               
    Shatner revved the engine and shifted the gears out of park.   Hooker then threw himself across the hood of the car.   Where his right eye was once, now there was a ruined socket of black sludge.   He yelled and coughed up black goop onto the windshield.   Shatner screamed and hit the gas.
               
    The car shot forward.    Hooker held on, coughing and splattering more thick black stuff onto the glass.
               
    Shatner could see well enough to guide the ambulance through the museum’s doorways.   The vehicle plowed through displays, destroying artifacts of Shatner’s public and personal life.   Shatner put on his seatbelt, held on tight, and watched his life flash by.
     
    * * *
     
    Kirk and the man in the Starfleet uniform jogged down the hallway.   The man’s name was Stephen, not that Kirk had asked, and he was very out of shape.   He wheezed and his lungs burned as he tried to keep pace with Kirk.   He very desperately wanted to get away but, after seeing what the phaser could do, he did not dare try to escape.
               
    “Please,” Stephen said, grasping his chest, “I need a minute.”
               
    “OK,” Kirk said as he scowled disapprovingly.  
               
    Stephen fell against the wall and gasped for breath.   Kirk paced about in the hall.   They were now far enough away from the scene of the murder that no one was concerned about their presence.   The convention attendees walked around Kirk and Stephen.
               
    “Marvelous,” said Kirk in amazement as he surveyed the people.   A few feet from them was a woman dressed as an Orion slave girl.   Her skin was completely painted green and revealing green fabric draped her body.   She was talking to a man dressed as a Vulcan.
               
    “Marvelous,” Kirk said again, eyeing the woman.   Stephen would swear he saw Kirk’s eyes sparkle.   
               
    Kirk confidently strolled over to her.   He stepped in front of the man and leaned against the wall, bracing himself with his elbow.  
               
    “You’re…wasting…your time.”   Kirk motioned with his head to the man.   “He has…no heart…no feelings…not…like me.”
               
    He moved in close to the woman.
               
    “Hey