Never Be Lied to Again Read Online Free PDF Page A
Author: David J. Lieberman
it takes her to answer no, the lower her score. This question concerns a belief and requires internal processing. Someone who holds no such prejudice answers quickly. A person who is prejudiced takes longer to evaluate the question and for-mulate her answer. The prejudiced person tries to come up with the "right" answer, which takes more time than merely giving an honest answer.
Another element to consider is pacing. How fast does the rest of the sentence follow the initial one-word response? In truthful statements a fast no or yes is followed quickly by an explanation. If the person is being deceitful the rest of the sentence may come more slowly because she gets that no or yes out quickly but then needs time to think up an explanation.
C L U E 22
Compensation
Be suspicious of someone whose reaction is all out of proportion to the question or comment. This person is attempting to accomplish a variety of objectives. She wants to appear outraged by the accusation, but she is not. So she exaggerates her displeasure, often ending up going a little overboard. She tries to convince you because the evidence doesn't. As Shakespeare said, "The lady doth protest too much." Also beware of diatribes where she repeats points that she has already made.
Sometimes a person may claim to be indignant about a cause or belief because he is trying to convince himself along with his accuser. This reaction, interestingly enough, takes place at the unconscious level. The man who claims to be adamantly against prostitution may be covering up his true feelings, which are the exact opposite. Not wanting to become consciously aware of what he really believes, he reinforces his overt attitude by expressing it aggressively. Of course, though, the person could just be passionate about his cause, so this statement needs to be viewed within the context of the conversation.
This person is also reluctant to use words that convey attachment and ownership. For example, while lying about his car having been stolen, he may refer to it as "the car"
or "that car" and not "my car" or "our car." When lying about a relationship or actions toward a person, he may use such phrases as "that child," or "the relationship," instead of "my child" or "our relationship."
C L U E 23
Emphasis Makes the Meaning
The pronouns /, we1 and us are underused or absent. The liar doesn't want to own his words. When a person is making a truthful statement, he emphasizes the pronoun as much as or more than the rest of the sentence. Instead of saying,
"Yes, I am," a person who is lying may respond with a simple yes.
Words of expression are not emphasized. For example,
"We had a greeeat time!" conveys ownership of his words.
Now say quickly, "It went great"—bland and noncommittal.
When a person is speaking truthfully, the initial one-or two-word agreement or denial may be elongated for emphasis—"Nooo," "Yeeesss," or "Of courrrse." This type of emphasis is usually absent in deception. This elongation occurs because the person is comfortable with his position and doesn't mind "playing" with his answer. A friend of mine who is an acting coach tells me that unpolished actors often speak all the words in their lines with equal emphasis, a dead giveaway that they are novices. The simple practice of elongating key words often makes for much more believable performances.
Additionally, there will probably be no highs or lows, just in-betweens. Not only is the voice higher—like any other muscle, the vocal cords tighten under stress—but varied voice inflection may be missing. We generally use inflection for emphasis when we are making a point. A deceitful statement often is delivered in a flat voice devoid of any real nuances.
C L U E 24
The Mumbler
The words themselves may not be clear; they seem forced.
This person is inclined to mumble and speak more softly than if he were passionate about his statement. Out of fear, however, it's possible that his voice may become higher
Another element to consider is pacing. How fast does the rest of the sentence follow the initial one-word response? In truthful statements a fast no or yes is followed quickly by an explanation. If the person is being deceitful the rest of the sentence may come more slowly because she gets that no or yes out quickly but then needs time to think up an explanation.
C L U E 22
Compensation
Be suspicious of someone whose reaction is all out of proportion to the question or comment. This person is attempting to accomplish a variety of objectives. She wants to appear outraged by the accusation, but she is not. So she exaggerates her displeasure, often ending up going a little overboard. She tries to convince you because the evidence doesn't. As Shakespeare said, "The lady doth protest too much." Also beware of diatribes where she repeats points that she has already made.
Sometimes a person may claim to be indignant about a cause or belief because he is trying to convince himself along with his accuser. This reaction, interestingly enough, takes place at the unconscious level. The man who claims to be adamantly against prostitution may be covering up his true feelings, which are the exact opposite. Not wanting to become consciously aware of what he really believes, he reinforces his overt attitude by expressing it aggressively. Of course, though, the person could just be passionate about his cause, so this statement needs to be viewed within the context of the conversation.
This person is also reluctant to use words that convey attachment and ownership. For example, while lying about his car having been stolen, he may refer to it as "the car"
or "that car" and not "my car" or "our car." When lying about a relationship or actions toward a person, he may use such phrases as "that child," or "the relationship," instead of "my child" or "our relationship."
C L U E 23
Emphasis Makes the Meaning
The pronouns /, we1 and us are underused or absent. The liar doesn't want to own his words. When a person is making a truthful statement, he emphasizes the pronoun as much as or more than the rest of the sentence. Instead of saying,
"Yes, I am," a person who is lying may respond with a simple yes.
Words of expression are not emphasized. For example,
"We had a greeeat time!" conveys ownership of his words.
Now say quickly, "It went great"—bland and noncommittal.
When a person is speaking truthfully, the initial one-or two-word agreement or denial may be elongated for emphasis—"Nooo," "Yeeesss," or "Of courrrse." This type of emphasis is usually absent in deception. This elongation occurs because the person is comfortable with his position and doesn't mind "playing" with his answer. A friend of mine who is an acting coach tells me that unpolished actors often speak all the words in their lines with equal emphasis, a dead giveaway that they are novices. The simple practice of elongating key words often makes for much more believable performances.
Additionally, there will probably be no highs or lows, just in-betweens. Not only is the voice higher—like any other muscle, the vocal cords tighten under stress—but varied voice inflection may be missing. We generally use inflection for emphasis when we are making a point. A deceitful statement often is delivered in a flat voice devoid of any real nuances.
C L U E 24
The Mumbler
The words themselves may not be clear; they seem forced.
This person is inclined to mumble and speak more softly than if he were passionate about his statement. Out of fear, however, it's possible that his voice may become higher
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