me. I invited these two over to clear my head of all the fog Reed caused tonight, not to relive the past three agonizing months.
An unusual awkward silence washes over us. No one knowing what to say to make the situation better. Each of us lost in our own opinions, the two of them, I'm sure, with their decided approaches to the mess with Reed. While I, on the other hand, am lost on how to tackle this mountain.
“Look, I know I was up for you guys coming over, but I'm exhausted. I don't mind if y'all hang out or crash here, but I'm just going to go to bed. Maybe sleep will bring me some answers on how to deal with this.”
Jo chooses to head home while Marsh decides to crash here for the night. I say my goodbyes to Jo then head straight to the shower.
Marshall and I have fallen into a routine when we stay the night together. He might as well be a roommate; for the past three months, we've spent a ton of time together. Both suffering from heartbreaks. While Marshall has had full disclosure on whatever the hell happened between Reed and me, he stayed tight-lipped about his situation. It seemed some days he was okay, happy even, and others he moped around like someone shot his dog.
Every time I tried questioning him about the status of him and the lover boy Tessa had mentioned, he always managed to brush off the conversation.
As I allow the water to cascade down my body, I think over the events of tonight. Obviously, Marshall had some words with Reed, and then Reed disregarded them and still came to me. I cannot believe he thought I’d go home with him. Just like that, after three months of not speaking to each other at all.
While we were together—well, not together but sleeping together—it was fun. However, I allowed feelings to get involved even though Reed forewarned me not to. Our demise was inevitable from the start; we’d never be more than friends with benefits. And while I don’t regret it, I can’t allow myself to get caught up in another dead-end relationship.
My heart won’t survive another fracture like Reed gave me the last time. If it happens again, it’ll completely shatter it.
Reed
I’m pissed. I cannot believe she didn’t come home with me. I knew, just fucking knew if I kissed her, she’d fall into my arms and want me all over again.
It’s easy to read Tegan. I used to see the way she looked at me. The way her eyes would go all dreamy after every kiss we shared, and I saw it again tonight. She can claim she cares for the boyfriend all she wants. I know she still cares for me too.
J.C. tried convincing me to tag along to Gator’s after the wedding. I had originally planned to, but when I saw Tegan alone outside the tent, all plans went out the window. I had to try to persuade her to come home with me. Her rejection stung. I was embarrassed and somewhat offended by it. So I took my wounded pride and left without a word to anyone else.
I’m sure everyone is irritated at me because I skipped out on my obligation of helping to clean up after the reception ended. Oh, well, fuck it. I had other shit on my mind. Everyone was lucky I even showed up to the damn wedding, I typically avoid them like the damn plague.
Even though I despise weddings, last night I wanted to leave for a different reason other than my warped past haunting me. Had I been there with Tegan as my date, I would have wanted to stay and be there for some of my closest friends. Granted, that wasn’t how last night went down, but I couldn’t convince myself to leave without talking to Tegan.
Having to watch her from a distance was horrible. I lost count of the number of times I wanted to pull her into my side and stake my claim on that beautiful mouth of hers.
As much as I would have liked to have done that; claimed her in front of our friends and her family, told everyone we’re together and if they didn’t like it, they could go to hell, I didn’t—I can’t.
Tegan is a hopeless romantic; a
Missy Tippens, Jean C. Gordon, Patricia Johns