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man you loved.  Save yourself before it’s too late.”
     
    “I can't,” was all Annika could say.
     
    Flame watched her with compassion.  He’d always liked her and regretted that he could do nothing to help.  They hugged and, after saying goodbye, Annika dragged her heavy feet home.
     
    That is how they lived after that.  Most of the time Stefan had a strong desire to inject heroin and Annika had an even stronger desire to kill Dick.

 
    ****
     
    Needless to say Stefan could not keep on top of his job anymore.  He was late for work, couldn’t concentrate on the jobs he had to do, and was extremely irritable most of the time.  Arguments with colleagues were becoming the norm.  With each passing day, his behaviour became less acceptable.  Excuses were made for him several times, thanks to his previous good reputation and the valuable knowledge he possessed.  But things were changing.  His brain was no longer sharp, his appearance put clients off and no-one felt comfortable working with him any more.  It was just a matter of time.  Everyone knew it was not possible he could be there for much longer.
     
    One morning the bank staff found their floor totally destroyed.  Windows were cracked, desks overturned, papers lay all over the floor and there were blood drops staining the white walls. When the management watched the camera records, they saw Stefan injecting heroin and drinking whisky.  He was quite calm for about fifteen minutes but after that he became aggressive, started shouting, tossing chairs and papers around, punching the walls and cursing his bosses.  It was the last straw.  His career, as well as any chance of finding a job anywhere in the country, just died.  Stefan was blacklisted everywhere.
     
    Unpleasant situations which made Annika furious inside were now snowballing.  Stefan's drug addiction was followed by his being sacked.  Loss of job was followed by being drugged to the eyeballs all night and sleeping it off all afternoon.  His new lifestyle meant that he did not drive her to work in the mornings, they no longer had breakfast together and she mainly saw him when he was high.  And all the above was followed by partying all night till dawn, with the requirement that Annika stay by his side.  That in its turn meant Annika was tired all the time, since she was able at most to sleep only two to four hours per day and then mainly during their car rides.
     
    Stefan developed an obsessive fear of being alone.  He needed loads of people around him and the very small amount of time they spent together was always shared with at least four to six others.  Those people were with them in the car, next to them during the parties and in their apartment after the party.
     
    Their nice cosy apartment had become a hotspot for drugs, sex and sleep for all those people. They were everywhere.  So as not to step on any of them, Annika had to look down at the floor when moving around.  She had to knock on their bathroom door to avoid accidentally seeing someone naked, or shooting up, or having sex.
     
    She began to spend the least possible amount of time at home, took on overtime and found comfort in her desperate patients.  She was as desperate as they were – if not more so.  With each day going home became more difficult.  And the greatest irony of all was that she could never find time alone with Stefan in an undrugged state to talk about it.
     
    That's how they lived.  For months ... They were drifting apart, losing the connection.  Stefan was losing control, and Annika was losing her mind...

 
    9
     
    The apathetic state Stefan was getting into after injecting scared and irritated Annika.  His vacant look and uninvolved behaviour proved that things were serious, that she was losing the battle and that most probably she would not get Stefan back the way he had been.  This last was the most painful realisation.  She tried just about everything, but nothing seemed to