can’t wake her up.”
“Must you stare so shamelessly?”
“I don’t notice you studying the fly specks on the ceiling.” He wasn’t that old. Nobody ever gets that old. And the lady deserved a stare or two. She was the nicest package I’d had stumble in in a long time. “Hell, yes, I must. How often do the gods bother to send us the answer to our prayers?”
He’s more alert at that hour than I’ll ever be. He honestly believes that getting up before sunrise is a virtue, poor misguided soul. “Attempt at levity noted, Mr. Garrett Noted and found wanting. I suggest we move her to the daybed and cover her, then get some breakfast into you. You’re less at the mercy of adolescent fantasies once you’ve gotten your blood moving.”
“How sharper than a serpent’s tooth is the tongue of an ingrate servant.”
He knew I couldn’t be talking about him. He wasn’t a servant. He was an in-house working partner.
He grabbed the woman’s ankles. I took the heavy end. Maybe he was put out because the woman had gotten several of his nieces’ shares of natural goodies. “Red hair, too,” I muttered. “Isn’t that nice?” I’m a sucker for redheads. I’ve been known to favor the occasional blonde, brunette, whatever, too.
Dean would just say I’m a sucker. He might have a point.
We put her on the daybed in the small front room, on the right side of the house. Your left, coming in the front door. She hung on to her package. Once she was set, I moved to the kitchen. Reluctantly. I was thinking maybe I should be there for her when she woke up, just in case she needed to throw herself into somebody’s arms and be comforted.
Dean filled me up with breakfast As I finished up Saucerhead arrived, to supervise me in my pursuit of physical excellence. Or incapacitating cramps, whichever came first. We yakked over tea for a while, me somehow forgetting to mention my nude. Would you tell a pirate where you’d found buried treasure? Then we went outside and got busy with our respective exercise regimens. I wore him down. He ran out of fingers before I ran out of laps.
Puffing and panting and aching, I forgot my mystery guest. Puffing and wheezing is a full-time job.
7
Last lap. Beer ahead. Relief only a few yards away. I came off Wizard’s Reach full speed, about a walk and a half, snorting like a wounded buffalo, listing from side to side, steering like a ship without a rudder. Only my neighbors watching kept me from getting down and crawling the last hundred feet.
I’d lost count of my laps. Saucerhead had slipped a few extra in on me. I hadn’t figured that out till a minute ago. If I lived, I’d get even with him if it was the last thing I did. If that involved running, it would be the last thing I did.
I had my chin down. You’re not supposed to do that, but I had to keep an eye on my feet. Otherwise they might quit. Meanwhile, I tried to figure how many laps Tharpe had shafted me. I’d lost count because there had been no landmark events to separate one lap from another. There were none to help me come up with an actual number, either. But I knew he’d done it to me.
I reached the foot of the steps honking and snorting, grabbed the handrail, dragged myself up toward the pitcher that would help put the misery behind me.
“This the character I’m looking for?” The voice wasn’t familiar.
“That’s him.” Saucerhead.
“Don’t look like much.”
“I can’t help that. I ain’t his mother.”
My pal. I got my chin up. Huff. Puff. Saucerhead wasn’t alone. Being brilliant, I’d worked that out, already. What I hadn’t figured out was that he was talking to a woman. Maybe.
At first glance she looked like Tharpe’s big sister. Maybe she had a touch of giant in her. She was taller than me by an inch. She had stringy blonde hair that would’ve been nice if she’d washed and combed it. In fact, she had nice stuff in all the right places, only she was so damned big. And so