Damsel Disaster! Read Online Free PDF Page A

go through. Loo’s at the far end.”
    Peggy waited outside while Sir Percy and I fumbled our way past the rows of dresses. The place certainly
smelled
like a loo. And there at the end of the room was a plank with a hole in it.
    “Thank goodness!” grimaced Sir Percy. “My armour, Cedric! Hurry!
Oooh!
”
    I hastily untied the straps of his leg armour.
    “Thank you,” he grunted. “Now GO!”
    I hurried out of the servants’ privy and shut the door just before a barrage of explosions.
    “Oo-er! Sounds bad!” said Peggy. “Whassamatter with your master?”
    “Something he ate,” I said. “So what’s with all the posh frocks in the privy?”
    “They’re Her Royal Highness’s best dresses,” said Peggy. “She reckons the smell keeps off the moths, so she keeps ’em in there. Much smellier than her own privycos all us servants use it, see. Anyway, I’d best get back to work. I’ve got to pick some lemons for the princess’s lemonade. She always has lemonade in the afternoon. If old Stewie catches me chattin’ she’ll kill me!”
    “What?” I said. “Stewie the goat?”
    “No, Stewie the High Steward,” she sniggered. “Goat’s named after ’er. Don’t tell, will you?”
    “Course not!” I grinned.
    “Ta! Bye then, Cedric,” said Peggy. “See you later, I hope!”
    She smiled and gave me a little wave as she left the kitchen. My face felt hot again. Probably because of the kitchen fire. Yes,that’s it. Definitely the fire.
    After a while the explosions stopped and Sir Percy called me to help him put his armour back on. As I entered the privy I tried my hardest not to breathe. I won’t go into detail. Let’s just say there was no chance of the princess’s clothes being eaten by moths any time soon.

    We returned to Patchcoat and the others in the clearing by the lake. We were just in time to hear Sir Roland and Walter starting to chant, “
Why are we waiting? Why-y are we waiting?
”
    “Silence!” cried the High Steward.“There you are, Sir Percy. About time, too. Are you feeling better?”
    “Ah, yes, thank you, I—”
    “Good!” she cut him short. “Now, gentlemen, your challenge is to rescue a lady from captivity. Only those who pass the test will be permitted to meet the princess!”
    “Excellent, Cedric!” said Sir Percy. “A
genuine
damsel in distress. Splendid! This time you’ll
really
see how it’s done. So, Your Stewardship, where is this damsel? Tied up somewhere among these trees?”
    “No,” said the High Steward. “Up there.” She pointed to the tall, round tower behind her. Perched on the battlements, aboutthirty feet off the ground, were three stuffed dummies.
    “What?” protested Sir Roland. “Aren’t we going to rescue the real princess?”
    “Don’t be ridiculous,” snorted the High Steward. “Do you think Her Highness would be stupid enough to put herself at risk?”
    “Well, at least we won’t have to worry about any kicking and screaming,” said Sir Percy. “So all we have to do is run to the top of the tower, grab a dummy and run down. The fastest knight wins, isn’t that right, Your Stewardship? Good job I’m not on the porky side, eh, Cedric?” he smirked. “I reckon
some people
would have a job making it up all those stairs!”
    He glanced slyly at Sir Roland.
    Sir Roland glared back. “Right, Percy,” he growled. “Just you wait—”
    “Silence!” barked the High Steward. “Sir Percy, you haven’t listened to a word I’ve said, you cloth-eared clot. I told you before that men are
forbidden
to go inside the castle. That includes the tower.”
    “But my dear lady,” said Sir Percy. “If we can’t use the stairs how can we rescue the dummies?”
    “Simple,” said the High Steward. “From the outside.”

Chapter Six
Dummy Trouble
    The tower had no windows or ledges and just a few arrow slits near the top. Its stone sides looked as smooth as glass. It would be impossible to climb them unaided.
    Sir Percy went rather