A Flawed Heart Read Online Free PDF Page A

“Skye’s puking in the bathroom. Can you
give us a hand?”
    Alana rolls her eyes and goes to help.
    “ You coming with?” Lydia asks.
    I want some air too, but I also feel as if I need a minute
alone. “No, I’m good, thanks. See you in a minute?”
    “Okay.”
    As they head out the front of the bar, I grab my bag and
look for another way out. There’s an emergency exit near the bathroom. I push
open the door, and find myself standing in an alley on the side of the
building. The cool night air feels good on my face. There’s a streetlight
overhead, and little moths are flying around it. I light a cigarette and take a
long pull, enjoying the way the smoke relaxes me. I look to my left and see
someone leaning against the brick wall. He has no shirt on and his fists are
balled up and pressing against his eyes.
    It’s Jason. I don’t want to intrude. I’m sure he came out here to be alone so I turn to go
back inside, only to find that the emergency door has no handle. My feet scrape
on the ground.
    “Claire?”
    “Yeah. Uh sorry. I was just having a cigarette. I didn’t mean to bother you.”
    “You’re not a bother. Can I bum one from you? I left mine inside.”
    I walk out of the light and into the shadow where Jason
stands, and hand him a cigarette. It’s disarming to see this man, who was so
sure of himself before, so vulnerable now. He’s not wearing a shirt, and
although I feel bad for him right now, I can’t help but stare at his perfect
chest. I take a drag of my cigarette.
    “You were really good. I liked hearing you play.”
    “Thanks. Sorry I got emotional up there. It’s a little
embarrassing.”
    “Oh, don’t be embarrassed.” I shake my head trying to make
light of it.
    “Sometimes, when I play I get overwhelmed. When I think
about my mother, I just…I feel so much regret. She suffered so much…you wouldn’t
understand.”
    “You’re wrong. I do understand.”
    He darts his eyes to mine, asking me an unspoken question.
His expression becomes soft with understanding. “Did you lose someone?”
    “Yeah. My daddy was killed when I
was twelve. He was a marine. He died in combat.”
    I feel the familiar lump rise in my throat.
    Jason takes a sharp breath in, flicks his cigarette away and
takes a step toward me. The intensity of his eye contact makes me apprehensive.
I never talk about my daddy with anyone. I look down at my feet and Jason
gently grabs and holds my wrist. The top of my head only reaches the base of
his neck. I stare at his fresh tattoo. It’s black, white, and gray. It’s a
Lilly with script around it. I can barely read it in the dim light but looking
closer I see it says, ‘Never let go’.
    “The tattoo. It’s for your mother?”
I whisper.
    Jason nods and leans down toward me. He presses his forehead
against mine. The only sound is our breathing. I feel our pain in my chest. My
heart is ripping open, and I want to comfort him and hold him and kiss him. I
tilt my head back and look into Jason’s eyes. The current running between us is
palpable. I part my lips and press them to his. The kiss is shy and tentative.
His lips are so soft…they taste like beer and peppermint, and they’re warm and
strong against mine. I realize how brazen I’m being and pull away. As I move
back, Jason’s grip on me tightens and he places his hand on the small of my
back so I can’t step away.
    I smile and kiss him again. This time he presses my body to
his and work his lips over mine, at first gentle and then rough. He lets go of
my wrist and I’m free to touch his body. I place one hand over his heart and
the other reaches up to touch his hair. He moans, grips my neck, and tilts my
chin up with his thumb. The kiss becomes more desperate, more filled with
desire—and warmth spreads through my body. He backs up against the wall and
begins to kiss my neck. He tangles his hands in my hair.
    I take this opportunity to breathe, but he kisses me again
as he slides his hand down to my