You Might Be a Zombie . . .

You Might Be a Zombie . . . Read Online Free PDF Page A

Book: You Might Be a Zombie . . . Read Online Free PDF
Author: Cracked.com
Computer) . But what happens when—either by public misperception or private manipulation—simply too much credit is given for a signature work? Not much, actual y, but it makes a tidy little list.
    5. TIM BURTON DID NOT DIRECT TIM BURTON’S THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS
    Ask anyone what their favorite Tim Burton movie is and they’ll tell you Edward Scissorhands . But rol your eyes, and say, “Yeah, besides that,” and they’ll probably say The Nightmare Before Christmas . The stop-motion animation managed to capture Burton’s quirky, dark vision and the imagination of mainstream audiences, proving once and for all that Tim Burton was no one-hit wonder as a director and that he could in fact do it in different mediums.
    Well, except that it didn’t do any of those things. It would have if Tim Burton had directed Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas . While he produced it and wrote the poem it was based on, Henry Selick of James and the Giant Peach was tapped for the actual directorial duties.
    Why didn’t you know that?
    When you put your name in the title of something, people just kind of make assumptions. And just like the rest of Burton’s movies, it’s dark and creepy, with great moments and horrible plot and pacing problems. Plus, it’s unlikely you knew Henry Selick’s name at the time. The studio made the rational decision to go with the name you’d heard before.
    It worked out pretty well for everyone except Selick, whose name you probably still don’t recognize. His biggest achievement subsequently has been directing Neil Gaiman’s Coraline . In a cruel twist of fate, that movie was promoted as a new film from the  director who brought you The Nightmare Before  Christmas, which by then you heard as Tim Burton’s The Nightmare Before Christmas . So the few people who did show up to Selick’s failed follow-up were probably only there because they thought it was directed by Burton. Ouch.
    4. GEORGE HARRISON’S GUITAR DIDN’T WEEP ON “WHILE MY GUITAR GENTLY WEEPS”
    No one’s denying George Harrison’s talent. He wrote some of the Beatles’ most famous songs while vying for album space against two of the greatest pop songwriters of all time. (If you’re too young to know who we’re referring to, go ask your parents, and be sure to tell them your upbringing was an abject failure.) But of all his accomplishments, George is probably best known for his classic cut “While My Guitar Gently Weeps,” featuring a searing and wailing guitar solo that fully realizes the promise of the song’s evocative title and that was laid down by George Harrison’s best friend, Eric Clapton, and not by Harrison.
    Why didn’t you know that?
    “While My Best Friend Eric Clapton’s Guitar Gently Weeps” just didn’t have the right cadence to it. The Beatles weren’t touring at the time and no one was making music videos, so it’s not like you could see George not playing the part. Also, the Beatles were never very into liner notes, which is why everyone from Clapton to Bil y Preston to the old guy who repairs guitars at your town’s music shop has been called the fifth Beatle at some point.
    3. JOHN F. KENNEDY DID NOT WRITE PROFILES IN COURAGE
    Much of Kennedy’s presidency remains debated by modern historians. Some praise him as a president whose charisma and vision inspired a generation to public service and led the charge to the moon. Others claim that if you put him in a room with Marilyn Monroe, obscene amounts of pain medication, and a horribly planned Cuban invasion, Kennedy wouldn’t be able to decide which one to do first. But what everyone seems to agree on is that Profiles in Courage, the book Kennedy won the Pulitzer Prize for, is a damn fine read. Profiles examined the bold decisions of eight U.S. senators and brought Kennedy the national attention and respect that was instrumental in building momentum for his presidential run.
    What’s not as clear is how instrumental
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