icon signaling that she was online too. We almost always signed on within minutes of each other. It was strange, not seeing her screen name pop up automatically.
With a heavy sigh I hit the sign off button and watched as the screen shut down in front of me.
Spinning slowly back and forth on my chair, I scanned the top of my desk. Several piles of paper were stacked in one corner, and a couple of CDs were propped up by a small jewelry box. My cell phone was plugged into an adapter on the printer stand, blinking a red light at me, signaling that it was fully charged. I picked up the phone and automatically hit the number one to speed-dial Kristen. It wasn't until the voice mail message started playing that I realizedwhat an idiot I was.The sound of her voice was so normal, and familiar, so… real. I had called her cell phone almost every day efore she'd disappeared, and never given it a second thought. Short messages, long messages, funny messages, even angry messages… I had left them all. Such a small, insignificant thing to do, but now I realized how important each one of those messages had really been.
A loud beep on the other end got my attention. I didn't know if I should say anything. Holding my breath for a second, I paused, and then spoke in a rush of jumbled words and thoughts. "Hi, Kristen, it's me. I don't know… I don't know what to say, or even why I'm doing this. It's not like… This is… stupid… I'm sorry."
I hung up the phone, feeling frustrated and angry at myself for calling. It wasn't like she was going to call me back. Wherever she was, her cell phone wasn't with her. She'd left it at home with a dead battery the night she disappeared.
Grabbing a blank piece of paper from my desk, I started doodling. Small pictures, bizarre designs, crazy symbols… anything that came to mind. I scribbled these things over and over again, until I had to grab a fresh sheet. Then I started writing down my thoughts. About everything and about nothing.
By dawn I had filled eight sheets of paper with random words. It was an exhausting process, but now that it was morning, I fell into a deep sleep.
I slept through breakfast again, and really felt like skipping lunch, too, but Mom gave me a strange look as I stumbled into the kitchen.
"Are you feeling okay, Abbey?" she asked, putting a hand to my forehead.
"Yeah, I'm okay," I admitted, sitting down at the table. "I've had a hard time getting to sleep lately."
Carrying over two bottles of water, she sat down next to me and slid one over. I stared at my hands resting on the tabletop, not paying attention to anything else. / really should go back to bed. I'm exhausted.
"Do you think you're not sleeping well because of the funeral?" Mom's sudden question startled me.
"That probably has something to do with it." The conversation from the funeral home sprang to mind, and I heard those women talking about Kristen again. "Or it could have something to do with the fact that some people in this town don't have any common decency, or good manners."
She frowned. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that this town is so freakina small, all it takes is one person to start an untrue rumor, and before you know it, it's become the absolute truth." Frustration filled my voice. "You know what I'm talking about, Mom, and you know it's not right. I heard some people saying that Kristen either killed herself or was into drugs. They shouldn't be spreading rumors like that. It's not fair to her family, and it's not fair to her."
Patting my arm, she put on her sympathetic tone. "I know how you feel, Abbey. But there's not much we can do. People talk. It will die down eventually."
"You don't understand, and you don't know how I feel," I snapped. "Or you would do something to stop the ones who talk about Kristen behind her back. Use your position on the town council. Do something about them''
"I can't control what the people in town think, Abigail. You know that." She stood up and walked over
With a heavy sigh I hit the sign off button and watched as the screen shut down in front of me.
Spinning slowly back and forth on my chair, I scanned the top of my desk. Several piles of paper were stacked in one corner, and a couple of CDs were propped up by a small jewelry box. My cell phone was plugged into an adapter on the printer stand, blinking a red light at me, signaling that it was fully charged. I picked up the phone and automatically hit the number one to speed-dial Kristen. It wasn't until the voice mail message started playing that I realizedwhat an idiot I was.The sound of her voice was so normal, and familiar, so… real. I had called her cell phone almost every day efore she'd disappeared, and never given it a second thought. Short messages, long messages, funny messages, even angry messages… I had left them all. Such a small, insignificant thing to do, but now I realized how important each one of those messages had really been.
A loud beep on the other end got my attention. I didn't know if I should say anything. Holding my breath for a second, I paused, and then spoke in a rush of jumbled words and thoughts. "Hi, Kristen, it's me. I don't know… I don't know what to say, or even why I'm doing this. It's not like… This is… stupid… I'm sorry."
I hung up the phone, feeling frustrated and angry at myself for calling. It wasn't like she was going to call me back. Wherever she was, her cell phone wasn't with her. She'd left it at home with a dead battery the night she disappeared.
Grabbing a blank piece of paper from my desk, I started doodling. Small pictures, bizarre designs, crazy symbols… anything that came to mind. I scribbled these things over and over again, until I had to grab a fresh sheet. Then I started writing down my thoughts. About everything and about nothing.
By dawn I had filled eight sheets of paper with random words. It was an exhausting process, but now that it was morning, I fell into a deep sleep.
I slept through breakfast again, and really felt like skipping lunch, too, but Mom gave me a strange look as I stumbled into the kitchen.
"Are you feeling okay, Abbey?" she asked, putting a hand to my forehead.
"Yeah, I'm okay," I admitted, sitting down at the table. "I've had a hard time getting to sleep lately."
Carrying over two bottles of water, she sat down next to me and slid one over. I stared at my hands resting on the tabletop, not paying attention to anything else. / really should go back to bed. I'm exhausted.
"Do you think you're not sleeping well because of the funeral?" Mom's sudden question startled me.
"That probably has something to do with it." The conversation from the funeral home sprang to mind, and I heard those women talking about Kristen again. "Or it could have something to do with the fact that some people in this town don't have any common decency, or good manners."
She frowned. "What do you mean?"
"I mean that this town is so freakina small, all it takes is one person to start an untrue rumor, and before you know it, it's become the absolute truth." Frustration filled my voice. "You know what I'm talking about, Mom, and you know it's not right. I heard some people saying that Kristen either killed herself or was into drugs. They shouldn't be spreading rumors like that. It's not fair to her family, and it's not fair to her."
Patting my arm, she put on her sympathetic tone. "I know how you feel, Abbey. But there's not much we can do. People talk. It will die down eventually."
"You don't understand, and you don't know how I feel," I snapped. "Or you would do something to stop the ones who talk about Kristen behind her back. Use your position on the town council. Do something about them''
"I can't control what the people in town think, Abigail. You know that." She stood up and walked over
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