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waiting until you got married.” Her brow wrinkled with worry as she stepped back and wrapped her arms around her center. “And it’s not like I’ve been completely forthcoming with you either. I…uh, I…I don’t li—”
    He closed the gap between them again, lifting her hung chin with his thumb and forefinger. “Shh, it’s okay. Not here. Let’s move out to the living room, where we can all sit and talk,” he suggested.
    Monroe nodded her agreement then peeked around Colin to where I stood, extending her hand out to me, compassion and understanding blanketing her face. “Come on, Seth babe, you too. The three of us have a lot to discuss.”

 
    “I am sorry
    and I will not
    stop being sorry.
    I will always fail
    you in moments because
    I am a terribly selfish
    human but I
    will never fail you
    when it matters most
    and that, my dear,
    is a promise weaved
    together with promise.
    I will always love you,
    and you must know:
    there are seas
    inside me
    and the waves
    only sway
    to the sound
    of your name.”
    -Christopher Poindexter
     
    Seth
     
    JEALOUSY WILL FUCK up a relationship faster than you can blink, and ours was no different. Surprisingly, Monroe wasn’t the one I was ever jealous of. Even after their impromptu destination wedding in the Bahamas during the summer between college and his rookie season in the NFL, which was attended by only his parents, myself, and my immediate family, I never felt threatened by her or what they shared. Monroe was not only good for Colin’s public image, but she was good for his soul, smoothing him out around the edges and helping to rein in the intensity he often struggled to control.
    Honestly, some days I was glad it was her who had to deal with him when he was acting like an ass, instead of me. She always knew exactly what to say or do to put things into perspective. When she had told us the story of her fucked-up childhood and the reason why she had no desire to ever be involved in a sexual relationship, my heart broke for her. If anyone deserved to feel loved and cherished, it was her. She had a heart of gold and the face of an angel, and I loved her like my own flesh and blood. Not to mention, it was her idea that he and I spend their wedding night ‘sealing the deal’, like all married couples should, and… Oh. My. God.
    But I digress.
    No, Monroe wasn’t the problem at all. It was every other couple that I saw out in public — kissing, holding hands, going out on dates, and enjoying their partner. All the things Colin and I could never do outside the confines of our homes. All because he refused to entertain the idea of coming out.
    You see, once Colin was drafted by our hometown New England Patriots, I found a job in Boston so I would be close by and we could continue whatever it was exactly we were doing. With Monroe’s blessing, of course. Though my parents were none too pleased about it, I’d changed my major my junior year from government and public policy to journalism with a minor in kinesiology. A life in politics was never what I truly wanted, and with Colin and Monroe’s encouragement, I decided to follow my dream to be a high school journalism teacher and rowing coach.
    At first, things were great. Better than great — amazing. I had a job I looked forward to going to each morning, a nice apartment in Bay Village, and a man who I loved more than life itself. With Colin spending the vast majority of his time at the team’s practice facility, acclimating himself to the game on a professional level, Monroe and I spent most evenings hanging out together — cooking dinner, watching movies, playing games, whatever we could find to pass the time. When he’d get home, the three of us would chat a bit before Colin and I would disappear into his room and Monroe into hers.
    But soon, it wasn’t enough.
    I wanted… no, I needed more. Monroe and I shared an incredible friendship, and I loved being around her, but when it got to the point I was