standing exactly where they had been, but were now defined only by the absence of light in the vague shape of a torso and limbs. I stroked Carlosâs cheek. I donât know if he noticed. He said the tests were inconclusive, and also was perfect in face and form.
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And now, a station editorial. Listeners, a lot has been made about the topic of beauty, and I donât think we in the media always do our best to promote healthy self-images.
Movies and magazines and TV shows and advertisers love to use photo and video editing to make people seem skinnier, fairer, more appealing to a false ideal of human beauty. And I think this takes a strong hold of us, especially children.
But remember you are beautiful only when you do beautiful things. Full lips arenât as beautiful as a full laugh. Skinny hips arenât as attractive as a quick wit. Think about treating others right and those others will flock to you in screaming droves.
Just peel back those artificial layers, Night Vale. Unzip that name-brand coat, those skinny jeans, wipe off that makeup, and gently (but very quickly) peel off that skin thatâs covering up the true you. Look at those exposed eyes, dangling unprotected from their gaping sockets. Look at the blood and sinew slowly uncoiling from quivering bones. Admire that slippery viscera trying to squeeze under those dynamic ribs of yours. You are organic, to be sure, listener. Be proud of who you are.
Speaking of pride, speaking of beauty: more from my date soon. But first, the weather.
WEATHER: âTeam the Best Teamâ by Doomtree
Letâs get right back into it, shall we?
After the park, I drove him back to his lab, next to Big Ricoâs Pizza. The drive was difficult, because at this point it seemed that everyone in town but the two of us had hopped onto the buzzing shadow entity train, and were loping around town as malevolent holes in our reality, emanating an energy that made the hairs on your arm stand and your bowels vibrate. Or maybe that was just the chemistry with Carlos I was feeling. A woman ran at our car screaming, a few of the shadow people chasing her, but before I could even touch the brake she must have changed her mind, because she had already turned into a shadow person herself. Itâs like, ugh, run from the shadow people or become one. Make up your mind, lady!
We arrived outside of Big Ricoâs and there was that awkward moment at the end of every date where you pause outside of the personâs door and itâs like, Should I call the City Council and submit the standard end-of-date report or are you going to? Also I was wondering if he was going to invite me into his lab, to look at all those breakers and humming electrical equipment.
âWell,â he said, pointing to the lab. âThis is me.â
âUh huh,â I said.
âI should probably do something about this buzzing shadow thing,â he said. âA few experiments to see if I can save the town.â
âOh,â I said. âDo you need any help with that?â
âNo,â he said. âA scientist is self-reliant. Itâs the first thing a scientist is.â
âOh,â I said again, but softer, sadder.
Which is when he leaned forward and kissed me, just once, just gently, just before slipping out of the car and into the lab. Iâll tell you, listeners, I was almost swallowed by a cloud of malevolent shadow energy on the drive home and I hardly even noticed. I was so happy.
I guess Carlos managed to find a way to defeat the shadow energy, as everything seems normal today. A couple neighborhoods are