The Color of Heaven Read Online Free PDF Page A

percent of siblings are complete matches.
    This helped to al eviate some of my guilt over not having had a second child who might have been a perfect match and could have saved Megan’s
    life.
    This was our reality, and we had to work around it as best we could.
    Thankful y, by some miracle, a donor was found quickly, which was a blessing, even though Dr. Jenkins informed us that the risk of complications
    increased if the donor was not a ful match, which he (or she) was not. But it was our only hope.
    I was relieved when Michael was able to leave the office to be present during the procedure. We both sat on opposite sides of Megan’s bed while
    Nurse Jean brought in the harvested marrow to be injected into Megan’s bloodstream.
    It was a simple IV bag fil ed with blood, which was hooked up to Megan’s central venous catheter.
    We were quite concerned over the fact that she was stil very weak from a recent high dose of chemo drugs, which was necessary to kil off the
    remaining cancer cel s in her body and make room for the new, healthy stem cel s. But Dr. Jenkins assured us that the transplant would help make
    her stronger, so we soldiered on.
    I was fascinated and fil ed with hope as I watched the blood flow through the clear rubber tubing into my daughter’s body.
    The procedure itself was over in no time at al – it lasted about 45 minutes – which hardly seemed possible.
    Even more surprising was that another hour later, Megan’s color began to improve, and she began to laugh at SpongeBob on the television. I
    couldn’t believe it. How quickly it had infused life back into her veins!
    The nurses told us that it happened that way sometimes, but I just thought Megan was special, and that some higher power was looking out for us.
    Even so, it was stil going to be a long recovery, we were told, and I knew what lay ahead of us. We would need to spend weeks or perhaps months
    in the hospital and continue with her therapy, but I was prepared for anything. I would have given up my own life to save her.
    Later, while Megan continued to giggle at the shenanigans on her favorite cartoon, Michael stood up, came around the bed, and began to massage
    my shoulders. He kissed the top of my head, and I pul ed his hand to my cheek, pressed my lips to the warmth of his palm.
    Perhaps everything was going to be okay after al , I told myself. Maybe there was hope that we could be a normal family again. Maybe we would
    even have more children.
    We laughed and talked and forgave each other for everything.
    That night, I cried again in the shower, but this time they were tears of joy. I laughed in relief as I wiped them away, and later, while my hair was stil wet, Michael and I made love in the back seat of his car in the farthest corner of the hospital garage.
    It had been a good day, and I treasured it.

Chapter Fourteen
    Six weeks later, Megan developed interstitial pneumonitis, a serious pneumonia that is associated with graft-versus-host disease.
    I had known that GVHD was a potential complication of the transplant, for Megan’s immunity had been greatly diminished by her chemotherapy
    beforehand. I was also told that under normal circumstances, it would take six to twelve months to recover immunity, but now, because of the
    GVHD, it could take years.
    I fought to stay positive, while Michael threatened a lawsuit.
    “ Please , Michael.” I begged him over and over not to burden Dr. Jenkins with court dates and legal problems. “We knew the risks of the transplant and we chose to go ahead with it anyway. Besides, we have enough of a battle as it is, just helping Megan stay strong. She needs to believe that
    we’re al on the same team.”
    But he wouldn’t stop laying blame. Nor would he talk to Dr. Jenkins about anything. He refused to be in the same room with her, which meant he
    stayed away from the hospital whenever she was on duty.
    o0o
    Things only got worse after that. Megan developed veno-occlusive disease, another