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that.”
    “You need to remember who programmed my interface. And hey, I like a good joke just as much as the next guy.”
    Thanks a lot Jon, thought Gilbert. “So where is Jon?”
    “Well, he really did go to Earth, but before we go any further, I need to tell you that Jon is not what he seems.”
    “That’s good because he seems like a pompous, arrogant jerk that would sell out his own mother if it would save his skin,” said Gilbert.
    “Really? Then he’s exactly what he seems.”
    “Okay, but is he a pompous, arrogant jerk that’s invading the Earth or not?”
    “If he is then it’s an invasion force of one. Truthfully, I think he’s using it as an escape route. You see, the only reason Jon is at the ICC is to keep him under protective custody. Jon got involved with some pretty mean people that deal in the sale of illegal weapons and such. This seemed to be the best place to hide him since it’s built like a fortress. Unfortunately, the bad guys are very well organized and extremely well funded.”
    “Are you saying that the bad guys are as powerful as the good guys? That doesn’t sound right.”
    “It’s kind of an inverse gestalt thing. You see, we have a lot of law on a lot of planets that take care of themselves, but we have very little law that focuses on the things that happen in-between planets. This has inadvertently fostered crime syndicates that operate independent of planetary governments and nobody really goes after them, each planet just cleans up after its own mess. So the major planets have organized themselves into a Federation and put together an intergalactic police force designed to go after these intergalactic thugs.”
    “And how’s that been working out?” asked Gilbert, expecting the worst.
    “Pretty good, up until a few hours ago. The bad guys have discovered Jon’s here, or was here, and hacked into my system. By the time I noticed it, they had already disabled my ability to call for help and shut down the teleports. Pretty capable folks. I don’t care what you say about them, you’ve got to be impressed”
    “I’d rather be impressed with your ability to get me the hell out of here.”
    “Don’t worry, Jon and I have put together a plan that should protect you.”
    “Great, so you’re sending me back to Earth?”
    “Remember when you likened Jon to a pompous, arrogant jerk that would sell his own mother if it would save his skin?”
    “Yes.”
    “Well, this is the part where he lives up to that description. He’s deleted all information about Earth from my system so that he can’t be followed or traced there and I can’t send you back. He’s left you here to take the heat.”
    “That’s the plan?” Gilbert screamed.
    “One for the montage,” said Ellie. “Not the entire plan, no. I’m going to take care of you here and not let the bad people get you. And when everything has blown over, we’ll send you back to Earth.”
    “How will you be able to do that if all the data about Earth has been deleted?”
    “I’m not sure, since Jon deleted that part of the plan as well.”
    “And you’ll be able to do all this even though they’re hacking your system apart?”
    “Sure, trust me. I’ve already partitioned myself into multiple aspects and we only need one to keep things going. Remember, this facility was built to stop an invasion force. I think I can handle these guys.”
    Famous last words, thought Gilbert.
     
     
    “I tell you, Bret, this is one tough nut to crack.”
    “But crack it you will or I might decide that you’re not worth what I’ve been paying you all these years. Then I take my refund out of your spine.”
    “Now why do you feel the need to threaten me like that? I was just making conversation. No need to go all hostile on me. Somebody wasn’t hugged enough as a kid.”
    “Listen, Stace, it took three years for me to reach that point with my therapist and if you keep bringing it up, I’m going to stop sharing. Just ignore me