Taming the Beast Read Online Free PDF Page A

toilet block used to describe the boys they drove around with on Saturday nights. Sarah did not think it was the proper word for what she felt.
    ‘It’s not that. I just miss you.’
    ‘So hurry up and sit down.’ He pointed to the stainless steel bench that ran through the centre of the room. ‘Talk to me.’ He sat himself at her feet, looking up at her. ‘I want to know what you thought of Emma Bovary.’
    Sarah sighed. ‘I don’t know. I sort of hated her, especially how she treated her kid, but I felt sorry for her, too.’
    ‘Tell me why.’
    ‘Well, because she was searching for something amazing, for ecstasy. But her husband’s such a plodder, so she falls for the first guy who offers her a bit of excitement and he turns out to be a pig and then the next guy is this awful coward and it just seems the more she searches, the worse things get for her.’
    ‘And this makes her deserving of our sympathy?’
    ‘I just think it’s sad she never found what she was looking for.’
    ‘Do you think what she was looking for even exists?’
    Sarah nudged him with her shoe. ‘Yes.’
    He took hold of her foot. ‘And what makes you think you’re not as deluded as poor Emma?’
    ‘You do.’
    Mr Carr frowned up at her. ‘Ah, Sarah,’ he said, and started to untie her shoelace.
    ‘You didn’t say if you missed me on the weekend.’
    ‘Didn’t I?’ He continued untying her shoelaces.
    ‘No.’
    ‘Do you want me to say it?’ Mr Carr slipped off her shoes and placed them on the floor beside him.
    ‘Only if it’s true.’
    He removed her socks slowly, using both hands for each foot, then laid the socks on top of her shoes. ‘Of course I missed you, you silly little thing.’ He raised her left foot to his mouth and kissed each toe in turn. ‘It’s intolerable to be away from you for so long.’ He kissed the top of her foot and her ankle. ‘Excruciating.’
    ‘I don’t see why we can’t meet on the weekends. I’m sure I could–’
    He stopped kissing his way up her shin. ‘I’m sure you could, Sarah, but I could not. I live in the grown-up world and grown-ups have responsibilities. Obligations to other people. I can’t just turn my back on my family because you’re having
urges
.’
    Sarah bit her lip. She hated it when he used his teacher’s voice on her. More than that, she hated it when he talked about his family. She knew they were out there – sleeping in his bed, eating at his table, laughing at his sticking up hair first thing in the morning – but it made her chest hurt to think about them. She wished she’d never brought up the damn weekend.
    ‘I’m sorry.’ She reached for his face and ran her palm over his smooth forehead, then the invisible, scratchy hairs on his cheek and jaw. ‘I forget there are other people who need you. When I’m with you, I forget that there’s anything else in the world. Please don’t stop kissing my leg. I like that so much.’
    ‘
She is all States, and all Princes, I. Nothing else is
.’ He smiled without teeth and lowered his head. His lips touched down on her knee for the briefest moment and then he looked up again. ‘Source?’
    ‘Donne. Um,
Sunne Rising
?’
    ‘Good girl.’ He began to lick the inside of her thighs, pushing her skirt up little by little. He moved slowly. Unbearably so. She was almost in tears by the time he reached the top. He groaned into her crotch, pressing his face into her underwear for a moment, before pulling back.
    ‘Take your pants off. And your skirt.’
    She stood and did as he asked, while he sat below her looking up between her legs.
    ‘Now lie on the bench. On your back with your–’ He pushed at the inside of her knees. ‘A leg on either side. Yes. Good girl.’
    The steel was cold beneath her, but she didn’t complain. In a few minutes he would be inside her and she could be lying on broken glass for all she’d care.
    He knelt at her left side and took her hands. ‘I’m going to show you