Tell me something else. What are my chances of getting out of here this month? My brother’s coming in from Nam.”
"Pardon me while I consult my crystal ball."
"Come on, Shakey, I mean it. What's the scuttlebutt? You’ve been coming here for years, You know all the shrinks. You can probably predict the release date for any man in this room."
Shakey looked pleased. He slowly scanned the room's occupants. It was true. He did know those things.
"Well? Any guess?" Nick pressed.
"A psycho stays put awhile around here, but I think you're fooling them with true psychopathic ease."
Shakey sounded very sure of himself.
"Cut the doctor talk. I was in combat."
"Nevertheless...you are fooling them." The older man tried to balance two halves of a teepee together.
Nick took them from Shakey's quivering hands and fitted them evenly. He began to glue the Popsicle sticks into a conical shape.
"What makes you think I'm trying to fool anyone?" Nick had dropped his voice to a whisper.
"I spend more time with you than the doctors, Nick. I've been around a long time."
"You think I'm crazy," Nick said flatly.
"Not bad crazy. You're like me. It comes and goes. Mostly it comes. You can't blame combat forever."
"You think I'll get out?" Nick asked again.
"You'll get out."
Nick had been holding the teepee so that it would dry, but suddenly he let it fall. Shakey picked lip the two sections and tried once again.
"That's what I had to know. They wouldn't tell me. I want to go home."
"Where's home?" Shakey asked as the Popsicle sticks flew apart. Discouraged, he swept them from he table,
"Houston."
"You be careful in Houston."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Nick glared, but Shakey was too busy filling a cigar box with the leftover sticks to notice.
“Your disease won’t let you go even if the hospital does. I've seen your kind before. Different problems but all of them sleeping under the same blanket.” Shakey nodded to himself sagely, pursing his lips like a strict schoolmarm.
“What disease?”
"There is an infinite variety of names and categories but it all comes down to plain old insanity. Rather out-of-date, that word, but pertinent." The old man rose from his chair, his great bulk squeezing aside the card table.
Who cares what you think?" Nick caught lamp parts as they rolled near the table's edge. "You know books. You don't know me."
Shakey gave one long blink as he stared down at Nick. An arrogant smile twisted his lips. "I know everything," he claimed, sounding more pontifical than ever. "I especially understand you, Nick. How else would I know you liked beheading those Vietnamese?"
Instantly Nick was on his feet and swinging, but the fat, trembling man was out of range. Nick's fists punched ineffectively at the air.
"How do you know those things? You don't know anything," he shouted at Shakey’s retreating back. ''I don't need you, you know that?" Nick was yelling now and couldn't stop himself. He saw the other men in the room staring and suddenly sat down. He grabbed the lamp wire and wound it around his left hand so tightly his fingertips turned blue. He sat at the card table until he was gently tapped on the shoulder and told to put away his things, therapy was over.
That evening when Nick had some time to himself, Shakey’s accusations returned to haunt him. Had he really enjoyed killing the Vietnamese that night? But he was not a soldier, he was a boy. He was just a boy and...suddenly an old memory stirred in his mind.
At the very back of she property line of the house in Bloomington, Texas, stood a weeping willow, its tentacle-like branches brushing the earth. Nick thought the willow was his secret hideaway where he could brood or daydream or, on his particular day, jerk off. Daley spread apart the branches and discovered his brother lying on his back locked in the throes of a sexual odyssey. Daley left as quickly and quietly as he could.
“Daley! Come back here!” Nick called.
When the willow
Yvette Hines, Monique Lamont