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the words came out right, and I meant everything I said, and I was glad I’d said it. I wasn’t doing it for effect either. I was really, properly sick of her, for about twenty seconds. After twenty seconds I calmed down and started trying to work out a way back into the conversation. And I hoped that the conversation would turn into something else—a kiss, and then marriage, after we’d been out for a couple of weeks. But I was sick of the way she was making me feel. I was too nervous, too keen not to make a mistake, and I was being pathetic. If we were going to talk again, it had to be because she wanted to.
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    My mum was talking to a bloke, and she wasn’t that thrilled to see me. I got the impression that she hadn’t got on to the subject of me yet, if you know what I mean. I know she loves me, but every now and again, in exactly this sort of situation, she conveniently forgets to mention that she’s got a fifteen-year-old son.
    â€œThis is my son, Sam,” my mum said. But I could tell she’d rather have described me as her brother. Or her dad. “Sam, this is Ollie.”
    â€œOllie,” I said, and I laughed. And he looked upset and Mum looked pissed off, so I tried to explain.
    â€œOllie,” I said again, like they’d get it, but they didn’t.
    â€œYou know,” I said to my mum.
    â€œNo,” she said.
    â€œLike the skate trick.” Because there’s a trick called an ollie.
    â€œIs that funny? Really?”
    â€œYeah,” I said. But I wasn’t sure anymore. I think I was still all confused after talking to Alicia, and not at my best.
    â€œHis name’s Oliver,” she said. “I presume, anyway.” She looked at him, and he nodded. “Have you ever heard of the name Oliver?”
    â€œYeah, but—”
    â€œSo he’s Ollie for short.”
    â€œYeah, I know, but—”
    â€œWhat if he was called Mark?”
    â€œNot funny.”
    â€œNo? But, you know…Mark! Like a mark on someone’s trousers! Ha ha ha!” said Mum.
    Never go to a party with your mother.
    â€œMark on your trousers!” she said again.
    And then Alicia came over to us, and I looked at my mum as if to say, Say “Mark on your trousers” one more time and Ollie hears some things you don’t want him to know. She understood, I think.
    â€œYou’re not going, are you?” Alicia said.
    â€œI dunno.”
    She took my hand and led me right back to the sofa.
    â€œSit down. You were right to walk away. I don’t know why I was like that.”
    â€œYes you do.”
    â€œWhy, then?”
    â€œBecause people let you be like that.”
    â€œCan we start again?”
    â€œIf you want,” I said. I wasn’t sure whether she could. You know how you’re not supposed to make faces because the wind might change and you stay like that? Well, I wondered whether the wind might have changed, and she’d be sulky and cocky forever.
    â€œOK,” she said. “I like some hip-hop, but not a lot. The Beastie Boys, and Kanye West. Bit of hip-hop, bit of R&B. Justin Timberlake. Do you know R.E.M.? My dad likes them a lot, and I’ve got into them. And I play the piano, so I listen to classical sometimes. There. That didn’t kill me, did it?”
    I laughed. And that was that. That was the moment she stopped treating me like an enemy. All of a sudden I was a friend, and all I’d done to change things was walk away.
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    It was better being a friend than an enemy, of course it was. I still had a party to get through, after all, and having a friend meant I had someone else to talk to. I wasn’t going to stand there listening to Mum laughing like a drain at Ollie’s bad jokes, so I had to spend it with Alicia. So in the short term, I was glad we were friends. In the long term, though, I wasn’t so sure. I don’t mean that Alicia wouldn’t have been a good