Second Chances Read Online Free PDF Page B

palpable, reaching me even across the miles separating us physically. She’d vowed never to love again, and for a long time I was sure she meant to keep that promise.
    â€œI’m so happy for you,” I whispered. “God, Jilly, you deserve to be happy.”
    â€œSo do you,” she returned and looked back over her right shoulder at me. “I saw you out there talking to Jackie earlier.”
    I paused for a beat, at last said, “Yeah, we were talking about the kids a little.” I wasn’t sure why I was suddenly hesitant. Jilly’s gaze sharpened instantly and I added, speaking too quickly, “He seemed weird. Reflective. He said…he told me he wished I would have shown him I was angry that he was cheating. It’s like he was hurt that I didn’t do anything about it.”
    Jillian ground out her smoke in the ashtray and then sat near me, her eyes intent. She didn’t seem inclined to speak and so I went on, “He told me that he was actually relieved when I caught him last Christmas. He didn’t have to keep up the charade anymore.”
    â€œHe was the limping horse,” Jilly said finally, as though to herself, and tapped the index finger of her right hand on her lips.
    â€œWhat the fuck does that mean?” I asked, but my tone was curious rather than scathing, despite my choice of words. Even though I knew it was about a dream. Jillian and her precognitive flashes; I had learned to take them with a grain of salt, though Great-Aunt Minnie had also been possessed of the gift, and no one had been skeptical of her. Not even Mom.
    Jilly rolled her eyes. “Last night after the fight, I dreamed about a horse limping across a field. A dark brown horse, limping like it was favoring a leg. I woke up speculating it was Blythe, but now I know it was Jackson.”
    â€œShouldn’t the horse have been missing a tooth?” I asked, sounding bitter. I swallowed that away and then said, for no real reason other than to irritate her, “Did you know that Jackie’s parents named him after the Johnny Cash song?”
    Jilly shot me the annoyed look I’d been expecting, her eyes crinkling at the corners and lips looking as though she was trying to bite through an apple seed with her incisors.
    â€œYeah, I guess so,” I said, listening to Tish and the boys goofing off in the background. “That used to be our favorite song. Jackie would sing it in the shower.”
    â€œHe’s limping to make you feel sorry for him.”
    â€œI know,” I said, quietly, lacing my fingers and fitting my thumbnails together.
    â€œHe’ll keep limping.”
    â€œWhat are you saying?” I asked, sounding more accusatory than I’d intended. But Jillian was silent, putting on her enigmatic face.
    â€œJillian Rae, I would never fall for a lame horse,” I said. God, did she think I was that pathetic?
    At last she sighed and then reached over with one hand to hook her fingers through mine. She said, “I know, Jo, but I had a shiver for a moment there.”
    â€œThen put on a sweatshirt,” I suggested. I wasn’t sure if I meant that to be bitchy or not; fortunately Justin’s truck suddenly beamed its headlights across the parking lot and Jilly chose to ignore my comment. She sat up straight, fussing with her hair once again.
    Uncharacteristically, she wondered aloud, “Do I look all right?”
    â€œYou look amazing, like usual,” I said, then teased, “What does it matter what you look like just to go have sex?”
    Jillian whapped my shoulder as she rose to her feet, slipped on her sandals, and called good-bye to the kids. Clint called back, “See you, Mom!” in his usual cheery fashion.
    â€œHave fun,” I chirped.
    â€œSee you in the morning,” she added, over her shoulder. “I’ll get up to say bye.”
    â€œThanks, Jilly Bean,” I said, utterly sincere.
    Justin leaned