Scars of the Future Read Online Free PDF Page A

everything you’ve done, Amanda Franklin. It’s a fairly annoying trait you have.”
    I smiled slightly and covered her hands with my own.
    “You will be an amazing mother, I promise.” She rest her forehead against mine and closed her eyes. “I’m going to be a grandma. That’s incredible.”
    Thirty minutes later we were both laying in her bed and she continued to cuddle me close. Mom let out a small sigh before squeezing my shoulder and I knew it was coming before she said it.
    “Is the father going to be involved?”
    I shook my head against her side. “I don’t know. You’re the only one I’ve told.”
    Mom didn’t press the issue. She just continued to encourage me and told me all sorts of stories about me as a baby. We laughed together for the rest of the night and I was instantly glad I’d come to her first.
    “I know you had decided to sell this house, but maybe now you should think about keeping it,” Mom said softly as we watched an old black and white movie together.
    I didn’t respond for a moment as I considered her words. Mom had paid off the house when Dad died, using a portion of the insurance money to do so. I had planned on selling it once Mom moved into a home, not wanting to be near the painful memories of my parents’ happiness. The thought of filling the house with that happiness again intrigued me. My parents had made this place a home, and I wanted that for my child. A home.
    “Maybe,” I replied quietly. “I’ll think about it.”
    “When do you start your internship?” Mom let one of her hands absentmindedly rub my stomach and I stared up at the ceiling.
    “The end of August. Two months.”
    I thought about the opportunity I’d been given to shadow a Social Worker who worked for the county and wondered if they’d even let me while pregnant. I had applied to so many internships my last year of school, and this one paid pennies but afforded me the best opportunities for experience. I certainly hoped they’d let me still work because I’d already given notice to my current job where I served at catered events. In less than a month I’d be unemployed until my internship started. Besides, the internship and job usually required a master’s degree, but with my excellent grades and references they had made an exception for me. The thought of losing it made my stomach feel queasy again.
    “Can I tell you something, Panda?”
    I sat up and looked at my mom curiously before nodding. “Of course.”
    “I’m excited to move into the home,” she admitted with a sheepish look on her face.
    I raised my eyebrows in surprise. “You are?”
    “I am.” She nodded. “I’m excited to be around other people who are going through a similar experience. The best thing about my life is you, Amanda. I know you’ll be at the home with me often, and that makes the thought of it that much more enticing.”
    I smiled as I considered her words. An invisible weight lifted off my shoulders and I sighed audibly.
    “I thought you might feel like I was… dumping you off. Abandoning you. I thought you were doing this for me.”
    My mom shook her head furiously. “Oh sweetheart, I know you better than that. I’ve been alone for a really long time. This is something I’m really looking forward to.”
    I let my head fall back on the pillow as I snuggled against her again. Coming to my mom had been the perfect decision.
    ---
    “That little flicker is the heartbeat. It looks like you’re almost nine weeks along, Amanda.” Dr. Eaton flashed me a smile as he pointed to the screen. “He or she looks fantastic.”
    I watched in awe at the tiny little formation on the screen. The sound of a racing heartbeat filled the room and I closed my eyes so it could wash over me. All of the sudden, I knew I could do this. Five days before I wasn’t sure I could even entertain the idea of being a mother, but now I wanted it more than anything. I had walked into this appointment feeling so nervous and