Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans Read Online Free PDF Page B

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    “This isn’t about a MacDonald versus Campbell feud, Glory. I swear it. I don’t give a damn about the Campbells.I told Blade that. We’ve avoided each other since I moved here and we both like it that way.” Ian gestured to the chair and I sank into it.
    “If I’m not, uh, never was human, what the hell does that mean?” Of course I’d been born to humans. My parents had lived in London. I’d married young to get away from their strictly religious household and, in just a few years, been widowed. Jerry had taken my mortality away when he’d turned me vampire. Before then, I’d been an ordinary female. One hundred percent. “You’re wrong. Run more tests.”
    “I’ve run dozens. A hundred or more.” Ian leaned against the table. “Like I said, I compared your blood to humans first. I got samples by mesmerizing some on the street, different ages, sexes, even nationalities. When that didn’t give me a match, I went to other vampires. I even found a blond, blue-eyed English-origin female vampire, similar age. There was an anomaly. You simply don’t fit. So I started on other paranormals—the fae, shape-shifters, weres—to see if that’s what you could have been before you were turned. So far, no luck.”
    “I don’t believe you. I have fangs. I drink blood. I fall asleep at dawn. I’m a perfectly normal vampire, right?” I heard my own defensiveness but it kept me from throwing up all over Ian’s expensive Italian loafers.
    “Are you? There’s that tummy bulge you keep complaining about. Penny told me you gripe about it endlessly. Yes, don’t bother trying to hide it. That was just the latest in your weird reactions to my formulas.” Ian caught my hand in the act of jerking down my blouse where it was supposed to do the camouflage thing.
    “I don’t believe you. Jerry would say you’re poisoning me. And now you’re playing mind games. Not ever human? Don’t make me laugh.” I shot out of the chair, unable to just sit still when he was trying to make everything I knew into a lie.
    “You don’t believe me? Ask Penny. I had her rerun every test, just in case you copped this attitude.” Ian held myshoulders and met my eyes so I could look into his mind and see the truth there.
    “Oh, shit.” The next thing I knew Ian had me back in the chair, my head between my knees. Great. I was turning into one of those females who fainted at the drop of a hat. Well, maybe this was a bit more than a hat drop. More like an ocean liner hitting an iceberg. Okay, I’d always been a drama queen. But this news deserved a three-act play, was Billy Shakespeare worthy. I sighed and pushed his hands off me before I sat up.
    “Seriously, Ian. I have memories of my human life. I had parents, a husband, worked at the Globe for crying out loud.” I saw my hands shaking. There. Human hands, no weird claws or… My mind froze. Ian took them, holding them tight. He was on his knees in front of me, staring into my eyes like he could will me to his way of thinking. I looked away, not about to be whammied into something.
    “We both know how false memories can be planted, Glory. It’s possible those things never happened to you. That your life before you met Blade wasn’t what you think.” Ian sighed and stood. “I’m sorry if you don’t like what you hear, but I’m just reporting what I found.”
    “Don’t you think Jerry would have noticed when he met me if I was something other than…?” I swallowed. “You know.”
    “You’d think so.” Ian stared down at me, studying me like I was a really interesting lab rat. “Penny has told me the story about how you met Campbell. Some romantic nonsense.” Ian smiled. “Seems he was struck by Cupid’s arrow.”
    “Don’t mock what you obviously don’t understand.” I pressed my hands to my eyes. What did this mean? How could it possibly be true?
    “You’re right. Love that could last for centuries sounds like a magic spell or an obsession.” Ian