Party Poopers Read Online Free PDF Page A

want to eat eggs, step out!”
    I saw Sharonda and Jennifer slip into the alley. “Me, stall?” I said. “Why would I stall? I can eat eggs with my eyes closed.”
    The girls came closer. Jennifer waved a big paw atme. “Honey Breath!” she called. “I’m here, Honey Breath!”

    â€œLet’s start,” I said. “I’m HUNGRY!”
    Sherman blew the whistle.
    Joe, Beast, and I began shoving eggs into our mouths. Ucch. I tried to chew. It tasted like pillow stuffing.
    I began sliding them down my throat without chewing. Two…three…Could I manage four? I had to!
    Next to me, Beast was shoving eggs into his open mouth three at a time. He made a glug, glug sound as egg after egg slid down his throat. Next to him, Joe Sweety had egg smeared all over his face. He was half finished with his first bucket.
    Crench handed me another egg. I pushed it into my mouth. The yolk stuck to my tongue. I shoved it down with another egg. Whooooah . My stomach started to bubble and churn.
    I couldn’t believe I was doing this. But it was for a good cause!
    Sharonda had her arms crossed in front of her. She rolled her eyes. “You guys are totally disgusting,” she said. She turned to Jennifer. “Could it be any more disgusting than this?”
    Just as she said that, I bent over and started to HURL my guts out.
    A waterfall of yellow egg barf gushed from my open mouth. Wet lumps of egg poured out my nose.
    The smelly egg barf puddled over my shoes. It stuck to my cheeks and my chin.
    When I finally stopped heaving it up, I raised my head and gave Jennifer a big, yellow grin!
    This has to work! I told myself. I’m totally gross and disgusting. This has got to turn Jennifer off.
    I pulled a chunk of egg barf from my nose and gazed at her.
    â€œBernie is a total competitor,” she said to Sharonda. “He always plays to win.”
    â€œBut, Jen—” Sharonda started to protest.
    The Ecch smiled at me. “I really admire someone who takes on a new challenge,” she said. She stepped up and began tenderly wiping the gunk off my face with her school scarf.
    I picked up the egg bucket and slammed it down over my head.
    What do I have to do to prove to Jennifer that I’m PITIFUL?

Chapter 14
B A -B OOM ! B A -B OOM !
    I was acting like a loser for so long, I started to feel like one!
    Come on, dude. Who is the greatest schemer and plotter on earth? Do I have to answer that? So why couldn’t I think of a scheme or plot to get rid of The Ecch?
    Defeated. Was Bernie B. actually defeated ?
    I couldn’t stand it. During the day I walked around campus with my head down, staring at my shoes. At night I sat for hours gazing at the two big cartons on my floor.
    The flashlights. The sweatshirts. They were gonna make me RICH! I had to get to the party. But NOT with Jennifer—with April-May.
    Sigh, sigh. Day after day I moped and sighed. My friends weren’t used to seeing me like this. I know they missed my funny jokes, my winning smile, my great laugh. But what could I do?
    Then, one gray afternoon I was surprised to see April-May June come running across the Great Lawn. “Hi, Bernie. How are you?” She flashed me a smile that sent me stumbling back across the grass.
    â€œUh…good,” I said. My legs started shaking. My chest fluttered. Was she actually being NICE to me?
    â€œBernie, would you go to the All-Nighter with me?” April-May asked.
    â€œWhuh-whuh-whuh-whuh,” I replied. My lips didn’t work. They suddenly felt like flapping, rubber balloons.
    â€œI did plan to ask Sherman Oaks,” she said. “But you’re so much cuter.”
    BA-BOOM! BA-BOOM! BA-BOOM!
    My heart was pounding so hard, the buttons on my school blazer popped off. Did April-May finally realize that she was my girlfriend?

    â€œYes,” I said. “Of course I’ll go to the All-Nighter with