Out of the Black Read Online Free PDF Page B

one finger along the rim of his cup. “I know you came home from the desert with a few loose screws rattling around in your head.”
    I looked up fast—too fast.
    Jay didn’t seem to notice.
    “I know the plant closed and now you’re flat broke. I know you had to mortgage the house to cover your little girl’s medical bills after the accident, not to mention Beth’s funeral.” He stared at me. “I know you’re in a hole that you won’t be able to climb out of anytime soon.”
    “That’s enough.”
    “I still can’t believe you borrowed money from Brian, or that you haven’t paid him back yet.”
    “Jay—”
    “I can only think of one reason why you’d do something that fucking stupid.” He paused, pointed at me. “You’re more desperate than I thought.”
    “Are you done?”">“Are we set?”’as
    “You need this job, whether you admit it or not.”
    “Not bad enough to do what you’re asking.”
    Jay folded his arms over his chest. “I only need you to drive, Matt.” He frowned. “You still have your van, right? Didn’t sell it?”
    “The answer’s no.”
    “We’re talking a few hours of your time, tops. Just long enough for me to call and arrange the exchange with the old man. Once we have the money, the wife goes home safe, and we split the cash.”
    “No.”
    “Do you have a choice?” Jay hesitated. “What do you think is going to happen with Murphy if you don’t pay him?”
    “He won’t come after me.”
    “No, but if word gets back to the Vogler brothers—”
    “I’ll deal with that when it’s an issue.”
    “It’s already an issue, Matt. That’s what I’m trying to tell you. It’s now or never.”
    I listened to Jay and didn’t say anything else. He was repeating himself, and eventually I started blocking him out. Soon, all I could focus on was how he moved in his chair, shifting his weight like he was sitting on knives.
    “What’s wrong with you?” I asked.
    Jay stopped talking. “What?”
    “Look at you.” I pointed at him. “You’re using again.”
    “It’s the flu. I’m still a little shaky.”
    I laughed. “You don’t have the Goddamn flu.”
    Jay looked past me to the window, then down at his hands. “It’s under control, Matt.”
    “You expect me to risk everything on your word? What happens when you fuck up?”
    “I’m not going to fuck up.”
    “You always fuck up,” I said. “All kinds of things can go wrong. You being a junkie only adds to the list.”
    Jay finished the last of his coffee and stood up. “Roach found a warehouse down by the river. Some artist used it as a studio, but he disappeared a while ago, and now the place is deserted. We’re going down tomorrow to check it out.” He took a pen from his pocket and a napkin from the table and wrote a number on the back. “I’m staying at her place. If you change your mind, call.”
    He held the napkin out to me, but I didn’t take it.
    “I can work something out with Murphy and the Vogler brothers,” I said. “I’m not desperate.”
    “As far as I’m concerned, we’re all desperate.” He dropped the napkin on the table in front of me and tapped it with one finger. “Call me.”
    I stayed at the table and watched him walk out the front door. I heard Dash bark, then Jay tell Anna her snowman looked great. She thanked him, but there was no warmth in her voice.
    I got up and stood at the window and watched as Jay closed the gate and walked down the street, out of sight.

    That night I made Anna’s favorite meal, macaroni and cheese mixed with a can of baby snow peas. I sat across from her and watched her work her way through two helpings.
    Halfway through the second, she looked up at me and frowned. “Why aren’t you eating?”
    “Not hungry,” I said. “I’ll eat later.”
    Anna lifted her fork and took another bite, chewing slowly. For an instant, she looked so much like Beth that I forgot to breathe. It wasn’t just a gesture, or the way she tilted her head