Not Your Mother's Rules: The New Secrets for Dating Read Online Free PDF

She was up all night reading
The Rules
and hysterical after finding out that she had broken every single one of them. We reminded her that she is a Creature Unlike Any Other and that any man would be lucky to meet her. We had her send us some photos and answer some questions so we could create an online profile for her—not the next day or the next week, but that very day. Alexa had modeled during college, so we gave her the user name SmartEx-Model32. She received dozens of adoring e-mails from men in the first few weeks. Well, what man wouldn’t want to date a model, former or not? She is nowmarried to a tall, handsome architect on whom she did
The Rules
!
    Now, some women argue that calling yourself “SmartEx-Model” or “PrettyMBA” in an online ad is slightly arrogant or conceited. Aren’t we supposed to be more modest? Absolutely not! If
you
don’t think you’re amazing, who will? Women, especially those who’ve had their hearts broken, tend to feel like “damaged goods,” even if they are pretty and accomplished, so we build them up online!
    Another client, Morgan, a forty-year-old accountant, was crushed when the guy she was seeing for six months told her he had met someone else. When she called us, we told her to go to a singles event so that men could drool over her. One guy she met said, “You are gorgeous! Do you have a boyfriend?” Being open and honest, she said, “No, the guy I was dating just broke up with me.” Of course, that was not a CUAO response, and the guy ended the conversation abruptly without asking for her number. He probably thought it was TMI. When Morgan called us the next day for a consultation, we said, “You are a CUAO! Why would you tell a guy you were dumped?” The next time a guy asked if she had a boyfriend, she said, “I guess I just haven’t met the right one.” She is now dating a handsome financial planner.
    Being a CUAO means you don’t have to answer every question thrown at you. So if you are twenty years old and a virgin and a guy you just met asks you if you’ve ever had sex, just say, “I’m not comfortable talking about that now.” And if you’re forty and single and a guy asks why you’ve never been married, don’t say defensively, “I’ve been engaged twice,” just be light and breezy and say, “I just haven’t met the right guy yet.”
    A CUAO would never put herself down or act self-destructively, even if she feels like a failure in the man department. She is not a doormat—she loves herself! She doesn’t cave in to peer pressure, nor does she pressure guys to sleep with her or be with her. She’s not an open book—she doesn’t blab on dates or overshare on Twitter; she listens more than she talks. She’s not jealous or mean-spirited, so she would never put down her ex-boyfriend to a new guy or write hurtful things on his Facebook wall. A CUAO would also never sleep with her best friend’s boyfriend or have a catfight with another girl over a guy. She believes what’s hers is hers!
    A CUAO has too much self-esteem to chase guys. She instinctively knows that every guy has a type/look, so whoever likes her will go after her. A CUAO is cool and patient. She waits for guys to make the first move at work, class, a party, or online. She knows deep down that a guy will either notice her or not, so she doesn’t try to make anything happen.
    A CUAO doesn’t rationalize non-
Rules
behavior, online or off. A CUAO is a cyberspace CUAO, too! She wouldn’t answer a last-minute e-mail or text that said, “What are you doing in five minutes?” She’s busy. She’s also not sarcastic or bad tempered. She would never write back in anger, “Not spending it with you!” or lecture men with “Why didn’t you ask me sooner?” She wouldn’t write back at all, to avoid a flurry of exchanges about nothingness. She hits the ignore button if it’s a waste of her time.
    A CUAO doesn’t try too hard or sweat any situation. She is okay with herself,