Norway to Hide Read Online Free PDF Page A

“Intermittently.”
    “So what do you think?”
    “Still not the right question.”
    I narrowed my gaze. “How about you tell me the right question.”
    “You have to guess.”
    “NO!”
    She fisted her hands on her hips and glowered. “I don’t remember your being this clueless when we were married, Emily. I’m waiting for you to ask me to be your matron of honor!”
    “You are?” Uh-oh . “Um…there’s a good reason why I haven’t asked you, Jack.”
    “I bet.”
    Where were the earthquakes and flash fires when you really needed them? “I—uh, I already have a matron of honor. Maid of honor, actually.”
    She clutched her chest as if the front closure on her Miracle bra had popped open and her breasts were in gravitational free fall. “You what?” she choked. “Go ahead. Twist the dagger a little deeper into my heart, why don’t you? I thought I was your best friend. Aren’t brides supposed to ask their best friends to stand up for them?”
    “They are,” I hedged, treading lightly, “and you mean a lot to me, Jack, but Sharon and I have history.”
    “We have history.”
    “Yeah, but Sharon and I go all the way back to pre-school. We memorized the alphabet together. We rodetricycles together. We acted in our first high school play together.”
    “We had sex together!”
    “That doesn’t count. We were married.”
    “Sex trumps the alphabet and tricycles. Ask anyone.”
    “It doesn’t. You can’t ask me to boot Sharon out of my wedding so you can take her place! That would be too tacky for words. Besides, she already has her dress.”
    “I could wear her dress.”
    “It’s a size two.”
    “I could stop eating. I could do it, Emily. It would only be for a few months. Pleeease?”
    I hung my head in frustration. “Jack, it’s going to be a very small wedding. A maid of honor and no bridesmaids.”
    She pretended fascination with her tissue package before sticking her bottom lip out in a dejected pout. “So what color is Sharon’s dress?”
    “Black. Since the Swiss are partial to black, we thought we’d do a black-and-white wedding.”
    Her head shot up. “Black? I can’t wear black. It turns my skin the most hideous shade of green.” Pout sliding into a smile, she stood up and straightened her miniskirt. “Aren’t you lucky you found someone to stand in for me? I would have looked like the Grinch in all your wedding photos. Would you look at the time? Eh! I’ve gotta run.”
    She rushed to the luggage stand by the window. “Portia and her friends are probably waiting for mein the lobby. They’re the most enthusiastic people, Emily. They’re all fighting over who gets to host me when I fly down for my book signing. I’ve already decided that when Tom and I retire, we’re moving to the Hamlets. Everyone is so happy. Must be all that Florida sunshine. Or maybe all the pulp in the fresh-squeezed orange juice. That’s gotta keep everyone regular.”
    She unzipped her suitcase and pondered the contents. “I might need help carrying these things to the lobby. Would the person who didn’t ask me to be the matron of honor at her wedding like to volunteer?”
    Might as well get used to it now. I was never going to live this down. “Whatever!” I dragged my jet-lagged body across the room, doing a double take when I looked inside her suitcase. “This is what you call a few extra copies?”
    She gnawed her lip self-consciously. “Okay, I might have gotten a little carried away.”
    “A little carried away? Five books are a few extra copies. Six books, tops. How many have you crammed in here?”
    “Seventy-five?”
    “Were you planning to hand them out on street corners?”
    She grabbed my arm in excitement. “Emily! That’s a great idea!”
    I rolled my eyes before regarding her and her suitcase with sudden suspicion. “Where are your clothes?”
    “Uhh, I know what I can do.” She zipped her suitcase back up and muscled it to the floor. “I’ll wheel the books