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haven’t even started our movie.”
    â€œNo problem,” I told him. “Don’t even think about it. We’ve already won.”
    â€œWon? How do we win? We’ve got nothing!” Feenman said.
    â€œTrust me,” I said. “I have the winning idea. No way we can lose.”
    I tapped Belzer on the head to get his attention. He spun around in his seat. “What’s up, Big B?”
    â€œBelzer—get that gorilla costume,” I said. “I want you to bring it to the zoo.”
    â€œHuh?” His mouth dropped open. “But, Bernie—you said it smells worse than Beast!”
    â€œBelzer, what do you care about a little smell?” I said. “You’re gonna be a star!”

Chapter 13
A TTACK OF THE R OOT B EER
    Friday night. Lousy Zoo Night. I sat near the front of the school bus and silently sang a little song to myself:
    Bernie, you’re so smart.
    I hope we never part.
    I’m your brain, and I can’t complain
    Because you are so smart.
    You like to scheme and plan
    Because you are the man!
    You’ll outsmart Sherman
    La–la–la–la–la
    What rhymes with Sherman?
    I couldn’t think of a rhyme, so the song had to end. But I sang it to myself a few times anyway. It brought a smile to my face.
    Don’t you ever write songs in your head?
    Hel-lo. Was I excited?
    Does a crocodile have lips?
    My heart was pumping. I could hardly sit still as we bounced our way to the zoo. Belzer sat next to me. I kept punching him in the shoulder. “You’re the man, Belzer. You’re the man!” I kept repeating.
    Belzer stared at me and rubbed his shoulder. “Are you okay, Bernie?”
    â€œAwesomely okay!” I replied.
    And why shouldn’t I be?
    I finally had the genius idea that would win the Horror Movie Contest. My scheme would win the contest— and ruin Sherman’s movie!
    No wonder I was writing songs to myself!
    The bus rumbled through town. Behind me, Beast shook up two cans of root beer, pulled the tops,and sprayed root beer over the last five rows of kids.
    That dude is a riot.
    Flora and Fauna Peevish were pinching each other and screaming….
    â€œNo, I’m not!”
    â€œYes, you are!”
    â€œI’m not! I’m not!”
    â€œYes, you are! I can prove it!”
    â€œOuch! That hurt!”
    â€œWell, stop pinching me!”
    â€œThen admit you’re wrong!”
    â€œ You’re wrong! Liar! Liar!”
    I jumped up and walked back to their seat. “Yo. What are you two fighting about?” I asked.
    They stared at each other for a long time.
    â€œUh…I don’t remember,” Flora said.
    â€œI don’t remember, either,” Fauna snapped angrily. “Who asked you , Bernie Big Mouth?”
    â€œYeah. Get out of our faces,” Flora said. “We were having a nice family talk till you butted in!”
    â€œOkay, okay,” I said, backing away. Talk about scary! I could videotape their “family talks” and win the contest!
    I looked toward the back of the bus and saw Mrs. Heinie leaning over Chipmunk. Chipmunk had ducked down behind the seat in front of him. I could see he was trying to hide.
    â€œIt’s too scary,” he said to Mrs. H. “I can’t sleep with big, hairy gorillas. I just can’t.”
    â€œBut the gorillas are in their cages,” Mrs. Heinie told him. “You’ll be safe and sound in your own tent.”
    â€œCan’t I stay on the bus?” Chipmunk asked in a trembling whisper. “I’ll just sleep here. Okay?”
    â€œNo one sleeps on the bus,” Mrs. H. insisted.
    Beast had an evil grin on his face. He shook up another can of root beer and sent a frothy spray splashing over Chipmunk.
    â€œMrs. Heinie, can’t you make him stop ?” Chipmunk whined.
    â€œNo, I don’t think I can,” Mrs. Heinie replied. “That’s why I usually keep him on a