Morning Man Read Online Free PDF Page A

coffee pot incident was the sizable damp spot on the carpet in front of the sink. She leaned over the water cooler, fitting her bottle beneath the spigot. Her eye still bugged her and she blinked hard as if commanding every nerve ending to remain still.
    “Hey,” Dub suddenly spoke, standing in the doorway behind her. “I’m sorry about before. I shouldn’t have snapped like that.”
    She straightened up, wondering if Tack had put him up to this. “No worries.”
    “Nah, I want to apologize. Seeing that it’s your first day here and all, I’ve done a shitty job of making you feel welcome. Sorry.”
    “You’ve been put in an uncomfortable position and I’m sorry about that. It was never my intention to come between The Rise Guys.”
    He cleared his throat. “Well, we should get back in there. Why don’t you bring your headphones into control and plug into the board? It’ll be more fun that way.”
    “Thanks, Dub.” She smiled, touched by his sudden transformation from brusque to civil. “I’ll do that.”
    The three of them sat inside the studio, and Tack put the first player on the air. “Hot Country One-oh-three. What’s your name, caller?”
    “Uh, hi. This is Phil.”
    “Hey, Phil. Dub’s going to ask you a Would You Rather question and then you’ve got to give us one back, okay? Our favorite Q&A gets a pair of Rascal Flatts tickets.”
    Dub leaned closer to his mike. “Okay, Phil, tell us: would you rather get first dibs or the last laugh?”
    The caller paused a moment. “I guess it depends on what the dibs were. If it’s sex, then yeah, definitely I’d wanna get in there first, ’cause I don’t do sloppy seconds.”
    Dayna let out a squeal. “Ugh, that’s nasty, Phil.”
    “Unless it was for you, Dayna, baby. Then I’d gladly wait my turn.”
    “Hey, hey,” Tack interrupted, “let’s keep it gentlemanly, Phil. What’s your answer?”
    “I’d rather have the last laugh. That way you always come out on top.”
    Dub shrugged. “Okay. And your question for us?”
    “If you were stuck on a deserted island with nothing but a crate of one hundred-proof whiskey, would you rather die of alcohol poisoning or die of thirst?”
    “Oh, that’s easy. I’d drink myself into a stupor to numb the pain of a slow, agonizing death,” Tack said.
    “While you crapped yourself senseless,” Dayna added. “Don’t make alcohol poisoning out to be so romantic.”
    “It’d be a heck of a lot better to go that way. And besides, I’m a fun drunk.”
    “Whee! Lookie me!” Dub jumped in. “I’ve got the dry heaves and I’m covered in butt mud.”
    She threw her head back and laughed. Yeah, it was low brow comedy, but damn, that was funny.
    “Okay, Phil, we kinda liked your question, so stay on the line and let’s go to another caller. You’re on with The Rise Guys and Dayna.”
    “Hi, Tack,” purred the female caller. “This is Naughty Noelle.”
    “Hey, Noelle,” he said, lowering his voice into a provocative growl. “Haven’t heard from you in a while, sweet thing. How’ve you been?”
    “Up to no good, as always.” Noelle giggled.
    Dayna rolled her eyes. Blech.
    “Okay, darlin’, here comes your question from the lovely Dayna Cook.”
    “I have a feeling this is gonna be right up your alley, Noelle,” she said. “Would you rather your parents watch a porno you had starred in or watch a porno that starred your parents?”
    “Meow,” Dub snarled, curling his fingers like a claw.
    “That’s a real toughie,” Noelle said. “I mean, neither would be something I’d ever want to happen.”
    “I think that’s the whole point,” Dayna said. “Choosing the lesser of two evils.”
    Tack’s hand shot in the air. “I know which video I’d rather watch.”
    She scowled. “Zip it, cowboy. This one isn’t for you.”
    “Uh, I’m going to have to go with the first choice because when I was little, I walked into my parents’ room while they were doing it. Trust me, I