marriage she hinted that I had ruined Philipâs life by marrying him, that the Winboltsâ reputation was irreparably damaged by associating with me. Philip had to work hard to reassure me afterwards that it was all nonsenseâshe can be very convincing.â
She stopped and looked at Emily. âYou are one of the most level-headed people I know, Emily, but yesterday you were so angry with Mrs Gosworth that you forgot about a very dangerous bull and could have been killed.And afterwards, when you were telling me about the stranger, you said you had felt âcherishedâ. Thatâs a very unusual word for you. You are much more likely to insist on your independence. You must have felt the need of comfort quite badly. Tell me, Emilyâwhat did Mrs Gosworth say to upset you so?â When Emily said nothing she went on, âWas it about me? Did she suggest that your reputation had suffered because of your relationship to me? I must say, I thought Philip had put a stop to such talk when he saw her earlier this year.â
âNo, it was nothing like that.â
âPerhaps she tried to suggest that you were unlikely to find a husband? Thatâs a favourite ploy of hers to any girl over the age of twenty.â
Emily said bitterly, âOn the contrary. She suggested that I ought to marry as soon as possible. It shouldnât be too difficult, she said, to find a husband for someone with a fortune like mine, even if they have little else to recommend them.â
Rosa was as angry as Emily had ever seen her. She said something under her breath, walked on a few paces, then exclaimed, âThat woman is poisonous. She should have been chased out of the neighbourhood years ago! Little wonder that her own family refuses to go near her. Why the county continues to receive her I do not know! Emily, she is not worth a second thought.â
Emily did not reply for a minute. Then she said quietly, âBut itâs true, isnât? I learned that before I was twenty from the man I had been about to marry. I had thought we loved each other, but he only loved my fortune. I heard him say it. âOf course Iâm not in love with her, Caroline,â he said. âYou know I love you. But I need her money. Good lord, why else would a man tie himself to a cool fish like Emily Winbolt? Iâd sooner go to bedwith a block of ice.â It was quite a shock.â Emily gave a bitter little smile and went on, âHe was furious when I called the engagement off.â
Rosa put her hands on Emilyâs shoulders and shook her. âI didnât know the young man, it was before I knew you, but you were well rid of him. He could never have made you happy. Emily, you are an intelligent, caring person with a delightful sense of humour. The sort of man you could love would have to be someone special. And he would be proud to have you as a wife.â
âWhere will he be found? Iâve met many men since, but never one I wanted for a husband. Most of them found my fortune more important than I was. Iâve never fallen in love again, never felt the least stirring of desire for any one of them. Half the time they didnât under stand what I was talking about. Even if they had cared. And very few men appreciate what you call my âdelightful sense of humourâ.â
âVery few men see it. You are always too guarded.â
âIâve learned to be wary. To tell the truth, I doubt now that I shall ever marry.â She looked at Rosa with the beginning of a smile. âAnd do you know? This will probably shock you, but I have to confess it. I didnât feel like a cool fish yesterday. That strangerâs kisses were far more exciting than any Iâve known before. They stirred me more than Harry Colesworthâs ever did. Isnât that scandalous?â She laughed. âDonât look so worried, Rosa dear. I know I couldnât marry the manâhe was little