Let Me Tell You Something Read Online Free PDF

family. I hated myself for getting sucked into it, but out of loyalty to myself and my family, I had to speak up. The second time was when I agreed to meet with Danielle in season two. At that meeting, as tensions rose, I called her a clown. To this day, even though “clown” is hardly the worst thing you could call someone, I regret that choice of words. I don’t like to hurt people but I’m not a coward. If something needs to be addressed, I prefer to do it without name-calling. Danielle pushed and pushed at that meeting and I called her a clown, and it hurt her. I felt horrible.
    BEHIND THE SCENES
    We have to be constantly aware of continuity while we’re filming—if we start filming a scene, we have to finish it; it’s not like we can just get up and disappear in the middle of a scene. When we were in Punta Cana, I got one of the worst migraines I’d ever had. I wanted to crawl into a hole and die. But we’d been filming, so they had to incorporate my migraine into the story, and then they insisted that I drag myself out of bed to watch Teresa try on bathing suits for forty-five minutes, but I could barely see. Watch that scene again—you can tell how sick I am. When I was allowed to go back to my room, I curled up on the bathroom floor with ice packs on my head, and threw up for the entire day while everyone else was out having fun.
    The third confrontation was this past season on the show. I was forced into confrontations by Teresa over what she wrote about me in her book. This is the first time anyone has seen me gun for Teresa, but I was actually done with her in season two. We were not friends before the show started, so I didn’t see any point to try to salvage a relationship that I never had. We’re not friends, we’re not enemies, we’re cast mates. How do you feel about everyone at your work? Some people you want to hang out with, some people you don’t want to hang out with. That’s how it is on our show. Sometimes, we’re just together for work.
    Whatever I’ve gone through with this show, and whatever the future seasons have in store for me, I know that my kids and my grandkids will always be able to watch the show and see me doing the right thing.
    You have to understand that on our television show, we shoot thousands and thousands of hours of tape. This gets boiled down to forty-five-minute episodes, and each of the five or six women has a story line. Only a fraction of what they film makes it onto the air. A five-hour event makes for a two-minute segment of the show. The camera doesn’t lie, but quite often my motivation ends up on the cutting-room floor. We’ve had scenes that were so funny that the cameramen dropped their cameras they were laughing so hard. But those scenes aren’t what the public wants to see. I wish people wanted to watch us getting along and having fun, but viewers are much more likely to tune in to a train wreck.
    I sometimes miss the way things were during the first season of the show, when it was all laughing and talk of “bubbies.” Almost every scene we shot was amusing to us. I miss the fun of the first season. These days, in many scenes, you can tell by my body language that I don’t want to be sitting in the middle of that bullshit. My shoulders are slumped and I’ve got a real puss on my face. You didn’t see that look on my face during the first season.
    But let’s face it—our show wouldn’t have ever grown into what it became if we hadn’t discovered that scandal about Danielle Staub in season one. Had Teresa not flipped that table, we would never have been as big as we are. That whole drama ultimately set the benchmark for the series, and that makes me sad, because in the season leading up to that, we had fun. The show was almost a comedy at times. And these days I think the show could be so much more; it could be life lessons sprinkled with good humor and