Knitting Rules! Read Online Free PDF Page A

cupboards in and around the other things that are there, and in any other wee space I can fit a skein.
DO YOU NEED TO LOSE A FEW POUNDS?
    The concept of a yarn diet, as difficult as it may be to approach, is a fair one. One simply refrains from new yarn purchases, using only stash yarns, until the required number of yards or pounds has been “lost.” I admit you have to be pretty far gone before you need this sort of drastic action … but you could be there. Let’s get an assessment:
    Question 1
    If asked to move so that you were at least 10 feet away from yarn, you would be:
    on the other side of the room.
    on the other side of the house.
    in the bathroom.
    outside on the sidewalk.
    Question 2
    How many people have mentioned your yarn “weight” to you in the last year?
    Nobody; how could anyone tell I have yarn?
    Only my husband, but he can be insensitive like that.
    Three, but they all live in this house, want closet space, and can’t be trusted.
    Only my neighbor across the road, but that’s because he can see in our windows. I got curtains.
    Question 3
    Has anyone ever told you that you have too much wool?
    Nope.
    Just my husband, but he can be insensitive like that.
    The lady who owns the yarn shop said something, but I think she’s jealous.
    Not a single person. Then again, I haven’t had much company since I gave up the couch for yarn space.
    If your answers are mostly A : For the love of all things knitted, get to the yarn store. You have nothing.
    If your answers are mostly B : Congratulations. You may enter at the amateur level. You don’t need a diet, and can continue to spend freely in the yarn store, but you should consider some new shelving. You’re going to need it.
    If your answers are mostly C : You have, despite a substantial stash, no need to control your yarn intake. You should approachyarn with commonsense moderation and … oh, nuts. You’re doomed. It’s just a matter of time.
    If your answers are mostly D : I don’t want to use the “D” word, but you may want to consider choosing lighter-weight yarns more often, if you know what I mean.
STASH IDENTIFICATION: SMELLS LIKE MOHAIR TO ME
    I’m forever finding yarn in the stash that I cannot identify. Despite my best efforts to be an organized and well-informed knitter, either I have weak moments or someone keeps breaking in and messing up my stash. Ball bands go missing (probably because I gave the yarn a test drive, then lost the ball band, rammed the yarn into a plastic bag, and then shoved it back into the stash, naked and unlabeled). Sometimes, though, because I have pangs of remorse and moments of insight, I’m compelled to write what’s inside on the outside of the bag. In this case, it’s likely that I’ll go into the stash, discover a bag that says
wool/acrylic
on the bag and then stand around wondering about the possibilities.
    They are:
    â€¢ The yarn is wool, but when I wrote on the bag, there was another yarn in with it that was acrylic.
    â€¢ The yarn is acrylic, but when I wrote on the bag, there was another yarn in with it that was wool.
    â€¢ The yarn is a wool/acrylic blend (of course, I don’t remember buying a wool/acrylic blend, but that doesn’t mean much. I think I go into a yarn-buying trance underextreme yarn conditions. I don’t remember buying half of the stash. I don’t let it bother me).
    â€¢ The yarn is neither wool, nor acrylic, nor a blend, but is instead some yarn of a completely unrelated fiber content that got jammed into a leftover bag that I didn’t notice had writing on it while I was trying to be a better person who keeps an orderly stash.
    Dear Inventor of Ziploc bags
:
    On behalf of the knitting community, I would like to take a moment to thank you for your contribution to our art. All over the world, knitters (and spinners) have yarn stashed away in the clear protective prison of a Ziploc bag. In