I'm Your Man Read Online Free PDF Page A

have a twin sister that I don’t know about, there’s no way you can take time off.”
    â€œI can’t believe you’re reacting as a businessman instead of as my friend,” Sheila said, violently tossing her PalmPilot into her purse. “I hoped that since you were going to see Lillith, too, and since you’re supposed to be Josh’s best man, you might help me find a way to convince her to give me some time off. You’d think there would be a way to free some time for my wedding.”
    I sympathized with her, but she knew how Lillith operated. The woman kept every magazine that placed Zodiac’s ads in a complete panic because she was determined to shoot each sun sign’s photos as closely as possible to the actual dates the sign encompassed. Added to that was her horror of Mercury’s capricious behavior and some nonsense about the power of the full moon on cosmetics.
    â€œCall me selfish, but I thought, since you’re one of my oldest friends as well as a business colleague, you might find a way to make this all work out,” Sheila added, her voice soft, perhaps even a bit defeated.
    â€œI am your friend. And you are selfish. I just don’t see it happening,” I said, and put my hand on her arm, giving it a gentle squeeze.
    â€œIt’s easy for you. You’re not the one running all over the world for the sake of a tube of lipstick. You’re the one pulling the levers behind a curtain like the Wizard of Oz, running the show. If you want to take a break, all you have to do is say Stop! and everything comes to a halt. But what about me? I have to answer to you, Lillith, Bob the pig, and Metropole. I just want to get married, for gosh sake.”
    We both paused, listening to the white noise of the airplane as it zoomed us to Baltimore, while we sat in our seats, stuck between a rock and a hard place. A flight attendant stopped by and asked if we’d like something to drink.
    â€œI’d love a Bloody Mary,” I said.
    â€œI’ll have a diet ginger ale, please,” Sheila said.
    â€œShe’s being awfully difficult today. Would you add a little arsenic to her ginger ale?” I asked. “Oh, wait. This is first class. I should be able to get cyanide.”
    â€œIgnore him,” Sheila said, giving the flight attendant a winning smile.
    The flight attendant eyed me warily, then stared at Sheila as if noticing her for the first time. “Aren’t you in those cell phone commercials?”
    â€œYes,” Sheila said, blushing.
    â€œI love the one where the spy is trying to break into an office, but he can’t remember the alarm codes. Then you fall down from the ceiling on a cable, like in Mission Impossible, with a cell phone in your hand so he can call headquarters.”
    â€œBut I scare the crap out of him and he ends up setting off the alarm,” Sheila recalled. “That was the first ad in the series. Another one will premiere during the Oscars, but it’s my last. I only signed to do five.”
    â€œThat’s too bad,” the flight attendant said. “They were cute. I’ll be right back with your drinks.”
    â€œYour fans know no altitude. We’re always running into people who adore you,” I said. Sheila shrugged, but said nothing. I couldn’t tell if she was trying to be humble or if she was still annoyed with me, so I said, “When we were teenagers in Eau Claire, I never thought we’d turn into the two people on this plane.”
    Sheila started laughing and said, “You didn’t? Gosh, when we were dating, I just knew you’d turn into a gay advertising executive and I’d be a jaded, bitter model.”
    â€œYou’re not jaded,” I said. “You’re tired. Anyway, when we were dating, even I thought I was straight. I dumped you for Sydney Kepler, after all.”
    â€œYou dumped me? I think not, Mister Man. I dumped you when you slept