Home to You Read Online Free PDF Page A

locked away again.  
    He stood, lifted me in his arms, and carried me to the couch. I buried my face in his neck, and he sat with me in his lap. My body began to tremble with my grief, and the tears I’d been trying to hold back began to flow. He gripped me tighter, held me secure, and rocked me gently.
    He told me everything would be okay. That he would always be there, that he would take care of me, and I felt my hair grow damp with the wetness of his tears. He held me well into the night, when exhaustion finally took me. I awoke early the next morning, tangled in Jake’s embrace. But my heart was empty. My brother was still gone.

    Three weeks after Dave’s death, the escrow closed on our childhood home. The deal had already been in place, and Mom had already purchased another home in Colorado—but I pleaded for her to back out.  
    She was moving with her boyfriend, Paul, who was already there waiting for her. I knew she needed him, that she was grieving too, but I couldn’t help feeling like she was choosing him over me. Over the memories of her own son—the memories of my father.  
    Jake became my rock. The only thing I had left in the world. We spent every night together, every weekend, and when the nightmares started, he began sleeping in my bed...  

      My heart slammed in my chest and I couldn’t breathe. The room was thick and foggy, like walking through a funhouse filled with a cloud of dry ice. Off in the distance was a dark hall, but I couldn’t see its end. I grew frightened and nervous. W hy was I here? Why was I alone?  
    Then up ahead, surrounded by puffs of white smoke, was Jake. His back was to me as he walked down the hall.  
    Come back, I wanted to yell, but panic squeezed my throat, and I couldn’t make a sound. I began to run, chase after him, and my heartbeat came faster and faster.  
    But it wasn’t fast enough, wasn’t good enough…I couldn’t catch him.  
    Jake! Don’t leave me. Please don’t leave me!  
    “Shh.” Jake’s deep voice filled my ear, and he pulled me to his solid chest. “I’m here. Shh.”  
    I opened my eyes, thankful it was only another nightmare, and pressed my hot cheek to his bare skin.
    “It was just a dream.” He ran a hand down my back. “Shh…”  
    His blue eyes locked with mine, and the backs of his fingers caressed the side of my face. “Don’t cry,” he pleaded, his calloused thumb brushing away a single tear.
    His voice calmed me. The soft light of dawn allowing me to see how much he cared about me. My dreams affected him more than they did me.  
    “I’m so sorry,” I whispered, knowing this wasn’t the first time I’d woken him this way.  
    “Don’t be sorry.” His voice was deep and groggy and he began to smooth my hair away from my face.  
    I could smell the familiar scent of his skin and my heart began to pound again.  
    “I haven’t had one in a while.” I looked up at him. His eyes were closed, and I thought he might want to go back to sleep.  
    “Yeah.”  
    My eyes shifted to the dimple of his chin, then slowly up to his full lips. He hadn’t shaved since the morning before and already had a scruff of beard. I ached to be able to run my hand along his jaw. To touch him the way I’d always wanted to.
    When I looked up again, his eyes were open, and he was watching me. My chest tightened with embarrassment, and I tried to pull away, but his hand caught me behind the neck, holding me firm.  
    My breath grew heavy under his gaze, and his hooded eyes moved to my lips. I was frozen, unsure of what was happening, and then his mouth came down to mine. Softly at first, like I could blow him away with an exhale, but then the kiss became firmer, sweeter, and he sucked softly on my bottom lip until I whimpered.  
    When his velvety tongue slipped into my mouth, he groaned, sending a pulse of need straight to the pit of my stomach. My hands trailed down his back, and his muscles flexed under my touch. I couldn’t