Home to You Read Online Free PDF
Author: Taylor Sullivan
think. My whole body was alive from his kiss, and all I wanted was more.
He rolled me to my back, his body heavy on mine, and looked deep into my eyes. For a second I thought he was going to pull away, but then he placed a gentle kiss on my forehead, my nose, and found my mouth again.
A soft moan escaped me, a low, primal sound I’d never made before. I arched against him, my body more alive with each touch, his erection pressing into my hip.
My insides turned to liquid, and I wanted to touch him. I wanted to give him an ounce of the pleasure his kiss gave me. With trembling fingers, I found the strings of his sweatpants, but the next thing I knew, he rolled away from me and sat on the far edge of the bed.
“Katie, I can’t.”
His words came on a breathy pant, but I felt them like a hard slap.
Embarrassment and pain surged through me, and I moved to the end of the mattress. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, not knowing what else to say.
“No, damnit.” He reached out to touch me, but I rolled my shoulder to shrug him off.
“Jake, it’s okay.” I took a deep breath, trying to force down the hurt, but bile crept up my throat. “I need to get ready. I have work this morning.”
As if on cue, the alarm beeped to life on my nightstand, and I reached out to silence it. The tension was palpable, and I didn’t waste a minute before pushing myself to stand and running to the bathroom.
“Katie!” He called out, but I didn’t answer. I closed the door behind me and turned on the shower so he wouldn’t hear me cry. When I returned twenty minutes later, my emotions locked away in the safe place I usually didn’t hide from Jake—he was gone.
As I pulled off the freeway, I took a deep breath and tried to process all that had happened. Everything changed after our kiss. It was in that moment, alone in my bedroom, I accepted the fact that nothing would ever come of us. That no matter what I did, he’d always think of me as someone to take care of, like the little sister he had to protect. Every contact became painful, and nothing remained of the playful banter we’d always shared. He never came to my bed again. Didn’t come into my room without knocking—didn’t seek me out at all. I was depressed, alone, and knew it was finally time to move on.
After graduation, I got the first job I applied for. A position as a photojournalist at a small paper in San Diego. Within a week, I’d packed my bags and had my car loaded. I was ready for a new start. Finally ready to put that needed distance between us so I could get over him…
Jake placed the last of my boxes into the back of my car, then shoved his hands deep in the pockets of his jeans. “Are you sure this is what you want?”
The tension was so thick I almost couldn’t breathe. “Yeah. It’s a great opportunity.”
His lips lifted in a smile, but his eyes were hard. Just like the wall that ran a thousand miles between us. He stepped forward and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. The thing he’d done a million different times, but a touch I hadn’t felt in weeks. “There are jobs here too, you know.”
My throat burned, my heart clenched, and fear bubbled inside me. Could I really do this? Move away from the last person who really knew me? The man who owned my heart? “Yeah, well. There’s nothing here for me anymore.”
I wanted him to say it wasn’t true, that he was still there. I wanted him to be angry, or hurt like I was. I wanted him to have any other response than what he did.
His jaw flexed, and he opened the door to my car. “I’m happy for you, Kit Kat. Call me if you need anything.”
I promptly got inside without giving him a second glance. It was easier that way. Easier not knowing if he was sad to see me go. Easier not knowing if he watched me as I drove away.
I cried the whole drive to San Diego, and continued every night for the first month I was there.
He rolled me to my back, his body heavy on mine, and looked deep into my eyes. For a second I thought he was going to pull away, but then he placed a gentle kiss on my forehead, my nose, and found my mouth again.
A soft moan escaped me, a low, primal sound I’d never made before. I arched against him, my body more alive with each touch, his erection pressing into my hip.
My insides turned to liquid, and I wanted to touch him. I wanted to give him an ounce of the pleasure his kiss gave me. With trembling fingers, I found the strings of his sweatpants, but the next thing I knew, he rolled away from me and sat on the far edge of the bed.
“Katie, I can’t.”
His words came on a breathy pant, but I felt them like a hard slap.
Embarrassment and pain surged through me, and I moved to the end of the mattress. “I’m sorry,” I whispered, not knowing what else to say.
“No, damnit.” He reached out to touch me, but I rolled my shoulder to shrug him off.
“Jake, it’s okay.” I took a deep breath, trying to force down the hurt, but bile crept up my throat. “I need to get ready. I have work this morning.”
As if on cue, the alarm beeped to life on my nightstand, and I reached out to silence it. The tension was palpable, and I didn’t waste a minute before pushing myself to stand and running to the bathroom.
“Katie!” He called out, but I didn’t answer. I closed the door behind me and turned on the shower so he wouldn’t hear me cry. When I returned twenty minutes later, my emotions locked away in the safe place I usually didn’t hide from Jake—he was gone.
As I pulled off the freeway, I took a deep breath and tried to process all that had happened. Everything changed after our kiss. It was in that moment, alone in my bedroom, I accepted the fact that nothing would ever come of us. That no matter what I did, he’d always think of me as someone to take care of, like the little sister he had to protect. Every contact became painful, and nothing remained of the playful banter we’d always shared. He never came to my bed again. Didn’t come into my room without knocking—didn’t seek me out at all. I was depressed, alone, and knew it was finally time to move on.
After graduation, I got the first job I applied for. A position as a photojournalist at a small paper in San Diego. Within a week, I’d packed my bags and had my car loaded. I was ready for a new start. Finally ready to put that needed distance between us so I could get over him…
Jake placed the last of my boxes into the back of my car, then shoved his hands deep in the pockets of his jeans. “Are you sure this is what you want?”
The tension was so thick I almost couldn’t breathe. “Yeah. It’s a great opportunity.”
His lips lifted in a smile, but his eyes were hard. Just like the wall that ran a thousand miles between us. He stepped forward and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. The thing he’d done a million different times, but a touch I hadn’t felt in weeks. “There are jobs here too, you know.”
My throat burned, my heart clenched, and fear bubbled inside me. Could I really do this? Move away from the last person who really knew me? The man who owned my heart? “Yeah, well. There’s nothing here for me anymore.”
I wanted him to say it wasn’t true, that he was still there. I wanted him to be angry, or hurt like I was. I wanted him to have any other response than what he did.
His jaw flexed, and he opened the door to my car. “I’m happy for you, Kit Kat. Call me if you need anything.”
I promptly got inside without giving him a second glance. It was easier that way. Easier not knowing if he was sad to see me go. Easier not knowing if he watched me as I drove away.
I cried the whole drive to San Diego, and continued every night for the first month I was there.
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