Heartstones Read Online Free PDF Page A

a chance, an opportunity to earn a proper income for once? You thought you’d just have him as well, as part of the package? Or were you just playing with him, a bit of an extra thrill, did you get a kick out of knowing he belonged to Sandra?’
    ‘I loved him.’
    ‘Do know what love is, Phoebe? When have you ever had a meaningful relationship?ʼ
    ʻI do know what love is, I know when it feels like youʼre just meant to be with someone no matter what. Thatʼs how it felt with David.ʼ
    ʻFor Godʼs sake, Phoebe, get real. Youʼre not in some Mills and Boon novel, you know.ʼ Nola shook her head and stared back down at the picture in her hand. ʻWhere did I go wrong with you? I tried my best and now I don’t know why I wasted so much time trying to bring you up after Mum and Dad died.’
    ‘Nola!’ Phoebe felt hot tears stinging in her eyes. ‘Please stop.’ But Nola went on.
    ‘I should have sat my exams and taken that place at medical school. I could have had you put in care you know, that’s what they wanted, all those social workers. They said I’d never cope with bringing up a ten-year-old but I gave up everything to do it.’
    ‘You didn’t have to give everything up, you didn’t give up Steve. You married Steve.’
    Nola sank down onto the bed and bowed her head. Her silence was worse than her angry words. Phoebe moved towards her and touched her shoulder. ‘Don’t!’ Nola flinched away, pulling her mac around her defensively.
    After a few seconds Nola turned to look at Phoebe, her face suddenly vicious. ‘How could you have been doing such a horrible, disgusting, deceitful thing? After everything Sandra and her parents did for us after the accident: they took us in, gave us a roof to live under when there was no one else; no rich relatives appeared to adopt us, you know, no fairy god-parents flew in to take us away, we were on our own – proper little orphans. What will Sandra’s parents think now? What would our parents think if they were still alive? They’d be so disappointed with you Phoebe, so upset – and Granny would have been too.’
    Instantly they all appeared in Phoebe’s head; her mother, pink-cheeked and sensible, always waiting with hot chocolate and flapjacks when they came home from school, eager to hear about their days, proudly pinning Phoebe’s drawings to the cork tiles on the kitchen wall; her father, usually lost in a day dream, his handsome face, sun tanned from working outdoors, hair like Phoebe’s own, wild red curls never quite contained by monthly haircuts from his wife. And lastly her granny; tall and graceful, white hair loosely coiled at her neck, draped in scarves and multi-coloured layers of linen and silk, except for when she was making pots – then she wore a faded smock and a wide-brimmed yellow hat. How Phoebe wished they were all still there. Still alive for her to disappoint. Tears poured down her cheeks and she didn’t bother to wipe them away.
    ‘Go on. Have a good cry,’ Nola’s voice grew louder. ‘It won’t do any good, don’t think I’m going to feel sorry for you. I suppose you think you’ve a right to grieve for David, is that why you’ve been moping around the flat for weeks?’ She paused and stood up as if to leave and then went on, ‘How am I ever going to look at Sandra again? I feel guilty and I haven’t even done anything! Sandra must never know what you did; she must never know that you seduced her husband.’
    ‘I didn’t seduce him; it was David that made the first move. He told me how unhappy he was with Sandra, how horrible she could be to him. He said he thought she had other men …’
    ‘Stop!ʼ Nolaʼs hand shot out like a policeman stopping traffic. ʻYou’re lying, they had a wonderful marriage.’ Nola moved towards the door. ‘I can’t bear to be with you any more. You make me feel sick, Phoebe; I don’t want to see you, I don’t want to be with you. I wouldn’t ever be able to trust you with