God Is Disappointed In You Read Online Free PDF Page B

secret behind his enormous strength.
He lied, telling her that if he was tied up with new rope that he would become as weak as a baby.  
    While he slept, Delilah tied him up with rope. Then she let the Philistines in to the house. They poured in to beat Samson into submission. But to Samson, their tiny little fists felt as if he were being pummeled by a declawed cat.  
    “Oh, isn’t that cute?” he said, rousing from his sleep. Then he tore through the ropes like cobwebs and demolished the Philistines with his bare hands.  
    Despite the obvious trust issues in their marriage, everything seemed to go back to normal for Samson and Delilah. And it wasn’t long before Delilah was again nagging him to tell her what made him so strong. Finally, Samson caved in and told her that his strength came from his long, beautiful, Michael Landon-esque hair.  
    That night, Delilah shaved Samson’s head while he slept. Apparently, Samson was a heavy sleeper. At last, the Philistines were able to storm the house and arrest bald Sampson without being killed by fists or animal parts. Not wanting to take any chances, the Philistines gouged out Samson’s eyes and threw him in a dungeon. 
    Many years later, the King of the Philistines was having a big celebration and thought it might be fun to trot Samson out as a party favor. They fished Samson out of the dungeon and stood between the center pillars of the palace so everyone could get a good look him. What they had failed to notice, however, was the fact that Samson’s hair had grown back.  
    Standing there, amongst the shrimp cocktails and mushroom appe-teasers, Samson regretted wasting so much of his youth on bros and hoes, and taking for granted the enormous power God had given him. Samson asked God to give him his strength back one more time so that he could finally do something useful with his life. 
    Blind and chained, Samson felt his biceps swell and the return of the old rush of adrenalin he felt as a young man. He reached out, grasped the pillars, and pulled them down with all his might, killing himself, the Philistine king, the cocktail servers, and everyone at the party. His hair had toppled the Philistine government.

Ruth
    Ruth begins with the marriage of an Israelite man to a foreign woman named Naomi. Naomi gave birth to two sons, who themselves married foreign girls, a pair of Moabites named Orpah and Ruth. Life was good for Naomi’s extended family until all three husbands died in quick succession, leaving the women in a precarious situation. In those days, a woman’s financial security depended completely on having a man around who could work the land, sell the crops and father loads of sons to do the same. Naomi inherited a tiny plot of land, but found herself without husband or sons and too old to get more of either. Things looked pretty grim for Naomi.  
    Realizing that her life had become a train wreck, Naomi told Orpah and Ruth to leave her and to return to their families in Moab. Orpah didn’t need to be told twice; without missing a beat, she caught the next camel back home. But Ruth couldn’t bring herself to leave her mother-in-law to starve or be eaten by coyotes or whatever became of old widows in those days. 

    So Ruth and Naomi braced themselves for the hardscrabble existence of a couple of homeless women. They got most of their food from the welfare system Moses had created. That is to say, she worked as a gleaner, one of the people who picked through a field after it had already been harvested in order to get whatever crops had been left behind. Whatever she could scrape together from the fields was what she and Naomi would have to live on.
    One day, the landlord was out supervising the harvest when he saw this young beauty in the fields, picking leftovers along with the cripples, drunks and other castoffs from Hebrew society. Intrigued, the landlord did a little snooping, and when he heard how Ruth had heroically chosen to care for her