Finding Purgatory Read Online Free PDF Page A

her sister emerged from a neighborhood street about a block back. Tori walked with a gait that was too quick to look natural, more like she was trying not to look like she was running. When she slipped into the passenger seat, she was breathless.
    Ani waited without speaking for Tori to start talking.
    “Did you mean what you said about money?” Tori asked. Where her posture had been defiant the first time, now she was sagging. She looked down at her feet, and her cheeks burned red.
    “Yes,” Ani answered carefully. “What—”
    “Look, I really don’t want anything from you, okay?” Tori gulped in air as if she’d been running again. “I need three hundred dollars. I’m short that much. That’s all. And . . .” Again she paused and huddled even more in her seat. “I just need you to drop me off now and come back in an hour and a half. Then you can forget I ever existed again.”
    Ani winced and stared at her little sister, anxiety churning in her gut. “Victoria, won’t you tell me what this is about? It’s not drugs or—”
    “No!” The girl huffed, pulling up her legs on the seat and wrapping her arms around them. “Jesus Christ. Like I’m a fucking criminal or something. I’m asking you for one favor, and you—”
    “Okay.” Ani held her hands up in a placating motion. “Okay. We’ll have to stop by an ATM. Just tell me where to go, and we’ll find one along the way.”
    Tori mumbled the directions, and Ani drove, her heart racing, wondering what she had just agreed to. She worried, trying to figure how she might deal with the myriad of bad-news scenarios that ran through her head.
    It took her several minutes to separate the quiet sniffling from the rest of the white noise at the edge of her awareness. Ani glanced over, surprised when she saw Tori’s eyes watering. As she watched, tears spilled over. Furiously, Tori swiped at her wet cheeks.
    Not knowing what to say—everything she said seemed to only make things worse—Ani drove on.
    When they arrived at their destination, understanding settled like a stone in Ani’s gut. Driving past a few protesters, she pulled into the parking lot of the women’s clinic and turned to look at her sister.
    By then, Tori was leaning over, her head in her hands as her shoulders shook, though her tears were silent.
    “Tori . . .” Ani fell silent when she realized she had no idea where to start.
    “Don’t, okay?” Tori’s voice was a raw bark. “Just don’t.”
    Ani blew out a sharp breath. “Okay, I get that you’re angry with me, but I’m concerned.” Making an effort to soften her tone, she spoke again. “You’re pregnant, aren’t you?”
    For a second, Tori straightened up and it looked like she was going to start yelling again, but her lower lip began to tremble. She opened her mouth, but the only sound she made was a little gulping sound at the back of her throat. Then she crumpled forward, her head in her hands again as she sobbed in earnest.
    Ani reached out with a tentative motion, expecting her sister to pull away from her touch. She rested her hand first on Tori’s shoulder. When she wasn’t met with resistance, she rubbed in soothing circles, the way she had when Mara was sick and whimpering.
    “There are other options, you know.”
    “What other options?” Tori sounded so miserable, the words muddled by sobs. “This is the only way.”
    “It isn’t. Talk to me, sweetheart. I can help you. We can find out more about adoption, or—”
    That brought all of Tori’s fury back. “Adoption? Adoption ? That’s not an option.”
    “Why—”
    “Yeah, newborns have a better chance of being adopted, I’ll give you that, especially if they’re pretty, perfect, white babies. But if they aren’t, sometimes they get left behind, sometimes they aren’t good enough, and then what? Then they end up in the fucking system?” She shook her head. “No way. I’m not doing that to another human being. I can’t just abandon