Facade Read Online Free PDF

having many ties anymore. We can pack up and move at any second. Maddox hates that part because it made it easier for me to come here. He’ll be glad when he finds out I don’t think I should go through with it.
    Maddox is passed out on the couch when I get home. We could only afford a one-bedroom place and it’s just like him to give the room to me. I guess it’s just like me to take it too.
    After the fastest shower in history, I throw on my sweats and a sweatshirt. I climb into bed, my body tired. Even my mind is, but it’s not shutting off enough to get any downtime.
    I read Adrian’s poem what feels like five million times. It’s so strange how you get it in your head who someone is before you meet them. Or even after you meet them, you get that one look and know how they are. It’s bullshit ninety-nine percent of the time, but that doesn’t stop people from doing it.
    The words on this paper aren’t who I saw when I thought of the boy who’s tied into my life so much, yet doesn’t know it. Questions rain down on me in a powerful thunderstorm: Does he write often? Does it help him deal? Is this something he shares with everyone?
    Curiosity swims inside me, filling up every nook and cranny it can find. I shouldn’t be curious about him. It almost feels morbid in a way, but I can’t help but wish that maybe knowing each other would be a step toward healing us all.
    “Stupid.”
    I look over at the clock. It’s one of the only things unpacked in my room. Bringing in money is much more important than making the place homey.
    It’s 10:00 a.m. and I haven’t slept a wink yet. I roll out of bed. My brother’s out on the tiny patio smoking a cigarette. It takes two tries to get the glass door to slide open right. “Hey,” I say, tucking my hands into the sleeves of my sweatshirt and leaning against the wall.
    “You’re up early.” I can tell by the scratchiness in Maddox’s voice that he just woke up too.
    “Couldn’t sleep… Have you called to check on Mom today?” I know the answer to that question before I asked it.
    “Did she worry about us when things got bad?”
    “Mad—”
    “Laney.”
    “Stop it.”
    “You stop it.”
    I swat him on the back of the head. “I’m not twelve. It’s not going to help to mimic me.”
    He takes a drag from his cigarette and lets the smoke out slowly. “Think we’ll be here long enough for you to register for a class or something? You should.”
    “So should you. I don’t have the money or the time right now.”
    “I’d make it happen.”
    I sigh, hating the fact that my brother feels the weight of our family on his shoulders. That he would do anything for me but nothing for himself. That he blames himself so much for everything falling apart that it’s the real reason he struggles with Mom. It hurts too much to see her. And… well, I think it’s the way she treats me, too, that makes me feel like crap. He shouldn’t lose his only parent because she can’t seem to stand the sight of me. “I know you would… I met Adrian last night.”
    At that he whips around to face me. “That fast? What happened?” His voice is a mixture of concern and annoyance.
    I shrug. “He was the guy who tried to… help me with the boxes yesterday. I didn’t know it, though. Then he happened to show up at the diner last night and I figured out who he was.”
    “Fuck,” Maddox groans.
    I’m pretty sure there’s a small tint of curiosity in his gray eyes. He’ll never ask, though. Not Maddox.
    “He of course doesn’t know who I am.” I pause for a second, trying to build a coherent thought from all the bits and pieces and fragments in my mind. “He’s broken, Maddy. I don’t know how I know it, but I do.” I kneel next to him. Drop my head on his shoulder. I hear the deep breath he inhales and exhales, knowing I’m hurting and hating it.
    “Do you think it’s our fault, somehow? I know that sounds stupid, but did we do something? Wrong someone? Should