Empathy Read Online Free PDF Page A

lets men fuck her for sport, and that’s where I get my women are usable fuck objects views from. Our father was a drunk who assaulted Blake and me, completing my fucked up psyche. I didn’t stand a chance of being normal, and because of my issues, I like to be beaten for fun. I like to go to dark, smutty clubs and let Doms or Dommes whip the shit out of me. I tell them it’s to punish me for my father’s abuse, for my mother not loving me and for my brother becoming who he is for me. The truth is I want them to whip some feeling into me, make me feel the guilt Blake lets consume him. When it doesn’t work, just feeling the cursed blood inside me leak out as I taunt the Dom with my laughs at his attempts to hurt me gives me a little buzz, and I crave that buzz. I like pain, and pushing someone to inflict it is the only thing I gain satisfaction from.
    Fuck. Clive the asshole in his cashmere golf club sweater is right. I am a freak and a self-harmer; accept I’m not the one doing the cutting. I let others cut into me instead.

 
     

     
    I LEAVE CLASS AND NOTICE that Clive and his close friend, Jacob, follow me. A sick part of me revels in the fact they’ll try to hurt me but only give me pleasure. I push through the main doors, squinting from the change in light. Blake is across the green, propped up against a tree, his demeanour unapproachable. It makes me smirk how girls still stare and smile coyly in his direction. Fucking whores. I raise my hand slightly by my side to signal him to stay where he is. His eyes dart to Clive who shoves me from behind.
    “Got nothing to say now your freak lover isn’t here to hear you acting the big man?” Clive spits.
    I turn to face him as he raises his arm and hits me with a closed fist right to my jaw. My tooth pierces the soft tissue and begins to bleed; the taste firing off all the dark places in my mind. I smile at him and laugh in my mind at his confusion.
    “Come on, pussy. Are you not going to hit me back?” He hits me again, catching my eye, the pain exploding and giving me chills.
    “Mmm, I’m going to fuck Melody in the ass and think of you when she squeals,” I retort. My smile grows when he shakes his head as if he just imagined those words leaving my lips. I said it quietly enough that only he would hear them.
    My pleasure doesn’t last. Blake’s fist comes from the right, quick as a flash, landing hard on Clive’s face. He goes limp, collapsing to the floor like someone cut the strings from a puppet.
    “I don’t have time for you to get off, Ry. I need to be somewhere,” Blake says, looking down at the guy he just knocked out.
    I swipe the blood from my lip, sucking it from my thumb as I follow Blake to my car.
    “Drop me at the airport. It’s just a quick stop over. I’ll be back tomorrow morning. I don’t like having to come here to give you a simple message, Ry. I hate you spending the night in those clubs and I’ve told you to come home to crash, and keep your phone on so I can contact you.”
    I know not to ask questions when he needs to go out of town and it’s meant to be kept between us if anyone asks, not that we have anyone who will ask. I know he worries if I don’t come home but I don’t care. I was busy feeding my urges last night.
    I don’t answer him, my mind on the fact he’s leaving. I blew my stash of cash last night. He always leaves me extra when he goes out of town, like a guilty bribe which pays for my night of pain. My mind is already in the club, tied to the rack, enjoying the bite of Mistress Dawn’s Whip.
    I drive on auto pilot and before I can blink I’m waving Blake off. I text Melody, establishing some form of relationship so she won’t be shocked if I push for a little something from her on Sunday. I want to watch her unravel in every way, despite my first thoughts to stay away from her. I’m too fascinated by her now, and the coincidence of circumstance tells me it is meant to be, and anyway, she pushed the