the ark, and the flood came, and destroyed them all. Likewise also as it was in the days of Lot; they did eat, they drank, they bought, they sold, they planted, they builded; But the same day that Lot went out of Sodom it rained fire and brimstone from heaven, and destroyed them all. Even thus shall it be in the day when the Son of man is revealed. … Remember Lot’s wife. Luke 17.26-32
Jesus had no problem with God’s first two mass murders [the flood of Noah ( 1 ) and the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah ( 3 )], or with God’s killing of Lot’s wife. It’ll be just like that at the end of the world, if Jesus has anything to say about it. He is just as nasty as the Old Testament God. Maybe nastier.
So remember Lot’s wife. And forget Jesus.
5. Er was wicked in the sight of the Lord (so the Lord slew him)
Genesis 38.7
Number killed: 1
Er
This is the first of God’s named murder victims.
We know his name (Er), his father’s name (Judah), his mother’s name (Shuah), and his wife’s name (Tamar).
Judah … saw there a daughter of a certain Canaanite, whose name was Shuah; and he took her, and went in unto her. And she conceived, and bare a son; and he called his name Er. … And Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn, whose name was Tamar. Genesis 38.1-6
And we know that “he was wicked in the sight of the Lord; and the Lord slew him.” But that’s it.
Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD slew him. 38:7
God killed Er for doing something, but the Bible doesn’t say what it was.
So what did Er do?
Did he get drunk and lie around naked in his tent and then curse his unborn grandson (and all of his descendants) with slavery because his son saw him drunk and naked? No that was Noah, “a preacher of righteousness.” (Genesis 9.20-25, 2 Peter 2.5)
Did he abandon his first son to die in the desert and then show his willingness to murder his second son for God as a human sacrifice? No, that was Abraham, a friend of God. (Genesis 21.10-14, 22.2-12, James 2.23 )
Did he offer his two virgin daughters to a sex-crazed mob of angel rapers and then get drunk and impregnate them? No that was Lot, a just and righteous man. (Genesis 19.8, 30-38, 2 Peter 2.7-8)
So what was it that pissed off God so much that he just had to kill him?
You’d think if it was important enough to kill him, it would be important enough to tell us why.
6. Onan spilled it on the ground(so the Lord killed him too)
Genesis 38.9-10
Number killed: 1
Onan
In his last killing ( 5 ), God killed Er for being wicked.
Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD slew him. Genesis 38.7
So Judah told Er’s brother, Onan, to have sex with his dead brother’s wife. (I guess Judah wanted a grandchild or something.)
Judah said unto Onan, Go in unto thy brother’s wife. 38.8
And Onan “went in unto” her alright, but before ejaculating he pulled out and “spilled it on the ground.”
Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother’s wife, that he spilled it on the ground. 38.9
Then God, who was watching the whole thing, killed Onan for ejaculating outside the vagina of his dead brother’s wife.
And the thing which he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also. 38.10
This story is used by believers to justify their condemnation of everything from masturbation (which is sometimes called “Onanism”) to birth control.
But I think it’s just another nasty, amoral Bible story. If there is a moral to the story, though, I guess it is this: Be careful where you ejaculate.
7. God’s seven year, world-wide famine
Genesis 41.54-57
Estimated Number Killed: 70,000
World-wide famine victims
This one is all about Joseph. There’s a whole series of stupid Joseph stories in Genesis: Jacob loved Joseph more than his other children (Genesis 37.3); Joseph’s brothers throw him in a well (37.24); Joseph is rescued
Jesus had no problem with God’s first two mass murders [the flood of Noah ( 1 ) and the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah ( 3 )], or with God’s killing of Lot’s wife. It’ll be just like that at the end of the world, if Jesus has anything to say about it. He is just as nasty as the Old Testament God. Maybe nastier.
So remember Lot’s wife. And forget Jesus.
5. Er was wicked in the sight of the Lord (so the Lord slew him)
Genesis 38.7
Number killed: 1
Er
This is the first of God’s named murder victims.
We know his name (Er), his father’s name (Judah), his mother’s name (Shuah), and his wife’s name (Tamar).
Judah … saw there a daughter of a certain Canaanite, whose name was Shuah; and he took her, and went in unto her. And she conceived, and bare a son; and he called his name Er. … And Judah took a wife for Er his firstborn, whose name was Tamar. Genesis 38.1-6
And we know that “he was wicked in the sight of the Lord; and the Lord slew him.” But that’s it.
Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD slew him. 38:7
God killed Er for doing something, but the Bible doesn’t say what it was.
So what did Er do?
Did he get drunk and lie around naked in his tent and then curse his unborn grandson (and all of his descendants) with slavery because his son saw him drunk and naked? No that was Noah, “a preacher of righteousness.” (Genesis 9.20-25, 2 Peter 2.5)
Did he abandon his first son to die in the desert and then show his willingness to murder his second son for God as a human sacrifice? No, that was Abraham, a friend of God. (Genesis 21.10-14, 22.2-12, James 2.23 )
Did he offer his two virgin daughters to a sex-crazed mob of angel rapers and then get drunk and impregnate them? No that was Lot, a just and righteous man. (Genesis 19.8, 30-38, 2 Peter 2.7-8)
So what was it that pissed off God so much that he just had to kill him?
You’d think if it was important enough to kill him, it would be important enough to tell us why.
6. Onan spilled it on the ground(so the Lord killed him too)
Genesis 38.9-10
Number killed: 1
Onan
In his last killing ( 5 ), God killed Er for being wicked.
Er, Judah’s firstborn, was wicked in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD slew him. Genesis 38.7
So Judah told Er’s brother, Onan, to have sex with his dead brother’s wife. (I guess Judah wanted a grandchild or something.)
Judah said unto Onan, Go in unto thy brother’s wife. 38.8
And Onan “went in unto” her alright, but before ejaculating he pulled out and “spilled it on the ground.”
Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother’s wife, that he spilled it on the ground. 38.9
Then God, who was watching the whole thing, killed Onan for ejaculating outside the vagina of his dead brother’s wife.
And the thing which he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also. 38.10
This story is used by believers to justify their condemnation of everything from masturbation (which is sometimes called “Onanism”) to birth control.
But I think it’s just another nasty, amoral Bible story. If there is a moral to the story, though, I guess it is this: Be careful where you ejaculate.
7. God’s seven year, world-wide famine
Genesis 41.54-57
Estimated Number Killed: 70,000
World-wide famine victims
This one is all about Joseph. There’s a whole series of stupid Joseph stories in Genesis: Jacob loved Joseph more than his other children (Genesis 37.3); Joseph’s brothers throw him in a well (37.24); Joseph is rescued
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