Down 'N' Derby Read Online Free PDF Page B

Falcon call you and tell you to come over here?” I inquired.
                  “No, I just wanted to see your mug.” She pointed to the coffee cup and then to my face. “Get it, mug? Anyway why am I supposed to come over here?”
                  I rolled my eyes at her joke, “He bought us something.”
                  “Oh, I love Falcon presents.” She grinned ear to ear.
                  “Not nearly as much as I do,” I sang back to her.
                  The door opened and in came Falcon carrying two huge crate like cages.  One was pink with black polka dots and one was bright orange. He set them both on the ground and went back outside without a word.  He came back with bags and bags from the local pet store. Nellie crouched behind me and whispered, “I see pet care products.  I’m scared.” 
                  “No shit—I swear if he brings a rat in this house, his ass is grass and I’m the lawn mower.” She and I backed up in a synchronized motion.
                  “No, no, no, he knows how we feel about rodents.  There’s no way.”
                  Just then Falcon came back in holding two identical cardboard boxes with handles at the top where the sides met.
                  “Oh my God, he got us fried chicken.” Nellie screamed and I snorted—they did look like fried chicken boxes.
                  Falcon laughed and beckoned us towards him with a wave of the hand.
                  “Oh hell no, I’m not coming near you until you tell us what’s in the chicken boxes.  You can forget it.”  I knew he wouldn’t bring us rats or hamsters so I wanted to go see but Nellie had a death grip on my arms.
                  “It’s two boys that want to see you.” He smiled.
                  I walked over first and Nellie ran to hide behind the kitchen counter.  I peeked inside the box marked ‘Poppy’ and absolutely melted.  Inside the box was a tiny brown and white hedgehog, curled up in a ball.  
                  “Can I hold it? Is it gonna prick me?” I asked.
                  “Nah,” he said and lifted it out of the box and handed it to me.  He whispered in my ear, “This is Oak. He was the cutest one.  But don’t tell Nellie.”
                  “I hope you didn’t waste one of our kids’ names on this little guy,” I whispered back. 
                  “Nope, those are locked in the vault.” He pointed to his head.
                  My back was still turned to Nellie and she wouldn’t let us have any slack.  “You’ve got three seconds to tell me what’s in the box or I’m gone.”
                  “Look,” I turned around and showed her the bundle of cuteness that I held. 
                  “Holy shit on a stick,” she said and cooed her way towards Falcon, ripping her own bundle of joy out of his hands. 
                  “That one I named Maple,” he said as she opened it.
                  She nestled and cuddled it for all of five seconds before turning her version of the stink eye on him.
                  “Alright, what’d you do,” she asked.
                  He laughed and kissed her temple, “Nothing, it had just been too long since I bought either one of you presents.  I saw these little guys in the window of the pet shop across from the bookstore and decided we could all use some cheering up.”
                  Nellie looked out of the window and for once in her life got very serious. “Ain’t that the damned truth.”

Chapter 9
    Nixon
    I hate when people have hair on their earlobes. Come on people, that’s why wax and tweezers were invented.  Gross.
     
                  Mad was back in full force.  He was actually smiling and having fun.