Crushed Read Online Free PDF Page B

something I expected to believe or feel. Ryan Alexander was by far
one of the most caring guys I had ever met. And probably the best looking.
             
I think he stayed longer than he really needed to with us. He would go home for
a few nights and then came back. Or he would go home at night but spend the day
hanging out with me. When he went back to work on a movie it almost felt sad
not seeing him every day. I couldn’t really explain it, but he was becoming a
really good friend. I loved that he would flirt with me, but he never really
made any moves. I wasn’t sure if Lacey told him what had happened to me, or if
he just knew it wouldn’t be worth it. But he respected me and I liked him even
more for it.
             
It was 4 months to the day after I had moved in, when Lacey came out back to
where Ryan and I were hanging out. She asked Ryan if she could have a moment
alone with me. When he left she looked at me with sad eyes
    “He
likes you” she says
    “Well
I like him, he’s a great friend... Which is shocking considering our first
encounter” I laughed moving closer to her on the deck
    “No
Em, he really likes you. I wasn’t supposed to say anything because Jason asked
me not to. But he’s been talking about you to Jason a lot. He’s stopped
sleeping around with other girls too because he’s always here”
    “So
because he got tired of sleeping around, that means that he likes me?” I asked irritation
creeping in
    “No
Em, I am his publicist I know what he does, when he sleeps with a girl every
month without fail, there is at least one little whore who wants a piece of the
pie, wants to tell his story tell the world about her one night with the
heartthrob Ryan Alexander. I haven’t had a single story come my way in 4
months. Not one”
    “So,
maybe the news is slow?” I say
    “Or
maybe you are taking all his time and attention and he doesn’t need anyone
else. Listen it doesn’t matter. I love Ryan, but I love you more. You are my
baby and I have to tell you this. Be careful, if you decide to do anything with
him. Just guard your heart. Ryan is complicated. He… I don’t know how to
explain it, he goes through periods of self-hate where he almost can’t let himself
be happy. Jason and I have really tried to pull him out of it, but his dad kind
of broke him when they were younger. SO if you decide that you guys want to do
anything, just keep your heart safe. I don’t want to see you get hurt”
    I
was confused. Mary and Michael were Jason and Ryan’s parents. I knew who they
were, I met them a few times over the years but I never really got to sit down
and talk with them. What I did see was that they were a very happy couple, and
they adored their boys.
    “I
thought that Mary and Michael were really good parents” I ask her
    “Oh
they are… Um... Michael isn’t Ryan’s dad”
    “How
is that possible, I mean Ryan is younger than Jason and Mary and Michael are
still married” I ask
    “Yes,
they are... But they split up for a few months when Jason was about 5. Michael
was always out of state on business and Mary couldn’t really handle life as a
single mom alone. She met Seth, Ryan’s dad at work and they kind of hit it off.
They slept together one night, and that was all it took. But Seth wasn’t’ a
good guy, Mary found out the hard way. But she was already pregnant. Michael
came home before Ryan was born and they fixed their marriage. She allowed Seth
to be a part of Ryan’s life until he was about 13 and realized that he was
hurting Ryan. He would beat him when he got bad grades at school, or when he
started to grow into his body he would tell him that he was fat. That’s when he
started working out.”
    She
went on
    “When
Mary found out that Seth was bringing girls to his house, and letting Ryan have
sex, she freaked out. She knew that Ryan did what his father wanted, because he
wanted to feel loved by his dad. Yes he had Michael, and Michael loved him