Chocolates for Breakfast Read Online Free PDF Page A

the door. Janet was playing her records of Stan Kenton, which Courtney did not like very much, but she was too lethargic to protest as the moody dissonance filled the room. It was raining, a cold spring rain that was very depressing after the week of fine weather. Janet was smoking a cigarette which she held in the hollow that her knees made under the comforter. When she took a drag she would lift up the comforter and blow the smoke in with her legs. After lights out she would fumigate her bed before she went to sleep, but it was too dangerous to have smoke in the room when committeemen were prowling about.
    It seemed strange to Courtney to have so much time to herself, now that she could not see Miss Rosen any more. Kenton took a riff and Courtney jumped at the sudden and strange volume. Crazy music, so intensely personal and almost neurotic. Bizet was so agreeable and gregarious. He was nicer to listen to but tonight Kenton’s music seemed to fit in with the lonely rain and the rolling bursts of sudden thunder. It had been a week since Courtney was condemned to this solitude. She often lay in her room now and looked up at the ceiling. She felt that it was even too much of an effort to go outdoors, and Courtney loved the outdoors.
    â€œTake a drag,” Janet commanded her.
    â€œI don’t want to. I don’t know how to smoke.”
    â€œYou’ve gotta learn sometime, and you might as well learn well .”
    Courtney didn’t bother to protest.
    â€œJesus, you don’t hold a cigarette like a pencil. Look.”
    â€œThat’s better. Now when you take a drag, inhale beyond the point where it catches in your throat.”
    Courtney tried and coughed like any neophyte.
    â€œI said inhale beyond the point where it hurts. Otherwise you’ll cough like an idiot. Pretend it’s air.”
    Courtney steeled herself and this time it was all right.
    â€œ That’s it,” Janet said with pleasure. “I’ll teach you to look sophisticated yet.”
    Courtney handed Janet back the cigarette and Janet waved away the smoke. She put on another Kenton record, “Abstraction,” and then she went back to her history. Within a few pages the medieval history had bored her again and she looked resentfully at Courtney.
    â€œHaven’t you got any studying to do?”
    â€œSure,” Courtney answered unconcernedly. “But I don’t feel like doing it. I can bull through French class and I’ve done my Latin—those are the only two that I worry about.”
    â€œGoing to hell fast, sweetie.”
    â€œI feel kind of lazy. . . . It’s a lousy night and it’s been a lousy week and I don’t want to do anything but lie here and pretend I’m out of this hellhole.”
    â€œYou’re going to get a jolt when finals come around.”
    â€œWhat the hell.”
    â€œOh, cut this crap with me,” Janet said angrily. “Stop feeling sorry for yourself and damning the world because you got hurt. I won’t put up with moods like this. Shape up, sweetie.”
    â€œThat’s easy for you to say,” Courtney answered gloomily.
    â€œLook, Court, do you think you’re the first person who’s ever been cut out of something that meant a lot to her? Do you think you’re unique or something?”
    â€œNo. No, I guess not. I’m sorry, Jan, I really am. I’ve been a bitch, I know.”
    â€œNow don’t start talking to me as though I were a staff member or something. This self-abnegation bit is no good, either. We’ve gotta shape up Courtney, that’s all. I think we’ll begin with studying. You’re still in this lousy place for another three weeks, you know, whether you want to be or not.”
    â€œYou sound like a parent.”
    â€œWhat’s the matter, haven’t you got anything to live for but that Miss Rosen?”
    Janet had struck on a vulnerable point.
    â€œSure, I’ve