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shimmer of tears. She wasn’t going to let Lois hurt her. She wasn’t going to wimp out this time and forgive her. “You don’t think she’s going to leave her husband and child for you, do you? You can’t be that stupid.”
    Lois’s fingers clenched around the keys she still held. “You might be surprised. Celia is in love with me.”
    Anthea allowed herself an unbelieving laugh. “I suppose she told you this during that class you both have been taking for the last three months.”
    Lois’s lips curved in a vicious smile as she crossed her arms over her chest. “What class?”
    Anthea thought, I’m not hurt yet, I can head it off. “Why couldn’t you just tell me you didn’t love me anymore? Why let me find out like this?”
    “Who said I didn’t love you anymore?”
    I haven’t heard you say you do! “You have a funny way of showing it. A very painful way of showing it.”
    “I still have feelings for you — “
    “So it seems,” Anthea said. “Like boredom. I don’t think that’s the kind of feeling that makes for a good relationship. And lying to me about a class so you can have an affair, that doesn’t help things either.”
    “What do you expect from me? We’re suffering from lesbian bed death.”
    Anthea steadied herself with a deep breath. “You
    don’t seem to have any problems being sexual. You just don’t want to be sexual with me. So call it what you like. Give it a clinical name. I’m sure somewhere you’ve found some self-help book that says having an affair is the best way to cure it.”
    “I’m supposed to go without sex?”
    “You promised you’d talk to me if you felt this way.”
    “If I told you I was having an affair, you’d go off the deep end like last time.”
    The deep end? In Anthea’s opinion, she’d behaved in a very civilized manner last time. Couples counseling, long talks, a romantic vacation. “You promised,” she said again, her voice failing her. She was going to cry. Her throat seized up and it hurt to breathe. I won’t let her make me cry.
    Lois stared sullenly across the kitchen at her. Anthea met her gaze as steadily as she could manage. She fought down the tears and found some inner core of strength. “Well, that’s that. Since you were so sure I’d go off the deep end, I guess I will. This is my house, so I think you’d better start packing.”
    Lois dropped her jaw. “You don’t think I’m going to move out at a moment’s notice, do you? It will be impossible to find an apartment in Berkeley.”
    Anthea straightened her shoulders. “You should have thought of that before you started screwing around with Celia. What did you think I’d do, invite you two to use the guest room? I’d like you out of here now, if not sooner.”
    Lois made a sound of disbelief. “I think you have a lot of possessiveness issues. You’re just trying to hurt me by throwing me out.”
    Damn right, Anthea thought. Of course I’m trying to hurt you! I can’t believe you did what you did — you promised it wouldn’t happen again. Anthea clamped down on her anger. “Are you implying it would be good for my psyche not to end our relationship? I should let you go on sleeping around?”
    “I think you’re just acting out some old issues with your parents —”
    “Don’t you dare,” Anthea said in a voice that came painfully out of her chest. “Don’t you dare imply that if I had worked out my feelings about my parents I wouldn’t care about you cheating on me. Sure I have possessiveness issues, I happen to feel possessiveness is just fine in moderation. I think it’s pretty moderate to want honesty and fidelity from someone I love.”
    Lois drew herself up with a grimace of distaste. “The least you can do —”
    “Is not let you walk all over me again. You break our agreement and expect me to show you consideration? To be kind and forgiving? Once was enough for me.”
    Lois shook her head slowly. “Is that all it was, an agreement?” Her voice